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StepMOMkillMePlease's picture

Hi everyone,

 

I am new to this forum and I need an urgent help. I am with my boyfriend that I am with for a year now. The thing is he has a 12 year old daughter - she is posiled rotten. I never seen him say no to her. Everything is fine, I dont even mind him spoiling her... What really gets me.. is that when they are not together she calls him everyday 7-8 times a day. Its getting really annoying. Please tell me if this is normal and I am the weird one. Thank you...

JRI's picture

I guess it's normal for an immature, spoiled girl to call him so much.  Does he think it's ok?  If you read around on this site, you will see many, many posts from stepmoms who feel the SD-Dad relationship is over the top.  Every one is a little different but "guilty dad" syndrome seems to be at the bottom of most.

Kes's picture

You will see the term "mini-wife" on this site a lot - and this is what is going on here.  Personally unless your bf sets some boundaries on his daughter's behaviour then I don't see a future in this relationship for you. He doesn't have to take 7-8 calls per day - and he can learn to say no to her - but will he?  Doubtful. 

Harry's picture

SD is a mini wife. She wants to be in control of your family.  She is trying to control  BF and your household by calling him all the time so you don't have fun. You can not foget about her. You can't not forget she has the power.

Yoi must stand on the sidelines watching this relationship.  No person alone time because she  allways there.  Your DH is picking her and her text over you.  She knows this and will not stop. But your DH is the problem because he is playing her hame 

StepMOMkillMePlease's picture

Hey guys, thank you for all your replies. The very same day I posted on this thread we had a fight and I think I explained it well enough. The next day morning he explained his daughter how its going to be... he told her not to call him all the time as it's stressful to be always alert when the phone rings. Since then it was harmonious.. THANK GOD ! Smile I guess I got lucky. 

StepMOMkillMePlease's picture

And he told me there wouldn't be a single thing he wouldn't do for me. Wow.. I really didn't expect that. 

Beenall3kindsofmom's picture

A 12 year old girl ought to be calling her friends, texting her friends, etc., 7 &8 times a day......not her Daddy! I would be curious if she did this before you were in the picture. My guess would be probably not. This is her way of staying the center of BF's attention and letting you know who comes first. Is it normal......no it's not, but your BF wil have to be the one to set some limits. 

Seriously7's picture

Personally, I don't think it's normal for a daughter to call her father several times a day, every day, but that's just my opinion. I would be annoyed too.