Family Christmas Picture
SD birthday was week. I am disengaged from her. DH told that he was going to breckfast with her and her kid. That's fine. So SD has stated that she wants to recreate her childhood for her kid. She is popping out #2 next week. SD is friends with DH family on Facebook. So I pull up Facebook in the afternoon of her birthday. There is SD "family Christmas picture" taken at her birthday breckfast. SD, her husband, her kid, SS, BM and DH. All in front of a Christmas tree. DH has said he was going just with her. Turns out it was the whole "original family" I asked DH a out it he told me he didn't tell me BM was going because I knew I would be mad.
i asked him why didn't he just see SD by himself and BM do something seperate. So he said that SD told him that the only way he would be allowed to see her on her birthday is if he went to her breckfast party along with BM. If he didn't she would not see him on her birthday. I said fine why didn't he just see her another day. He said he wanted to see her on her birthday. BM is remarried her husband is not in the picture either.
I am mad. I don't think DH should be in a Family Christmas picture without his Wife. I also mad that DH plays along with 35 year old SD's game of recreating the " Royal first bio family" DH has a wife and it is no longer BM. I think DH is being disrespectful to our marriage and Me. He sees nothing wrong with it and nothing wrong with not telling me he was going with the original family plus SIL and grandkid who of course are accepted With open arms while his wife is not allowed to exist.
second part of the story. SD is giving birth next week. I am not allowed anywhere near. I have never seen first kid who is 3. DH wants me to forget and forgive all the. narcissistic abuse and games by stepdaughter and start over. But the catch. SD will not admit or apologize to any of her actions. I have to give up ever expecting some kind of apology. I will still not be allowed to be around any of them. I will be allowed and expected to give SD a present for the new kid. In return SD will accept the present from me.
So DH gave a letter to me and his 2 narcisstic POS. Full of bible verses and saying that he wants everyone to treat each other with love, kindness and respect. Forget the past and start over. So I said fine if his kids apologizes and take back the horrible slander and accusations about me I will start a new. DH says no that they will never apologize or own their actions. That I need to forget about it. I am still not allowed to be anywhere near them. He will still continue his seperate life with them. And I need to be happy about it.
How is any of that A 2 way street of love, kindness and respect?
So I am very artistic. DH say I need to make the present for the new kid that I will not be allowed to see and show SD I am reaching out to her. No way. I will not put myself into making something to my narcissistic abuser. I am being the bigger person and went out and bought a shirt for the kid and gave it to DH so he can give it to his mini wife. So DH is happy. I feel like crap.
SO now SD can write me a thank you note and Daddy can see what a wonderful kind person his little princess mini wife is.
I never dreamed that I would marry into such sick family drama. I have stated to DH that Any of them will never step foot in our house(I own the house we live in). I only did this after being forbidden to be allowed near the "royals".
How would you react to the family picture and being allowed to give the new POS a present?