For those who have read my previous posts....here is just a little of what I have dealt with.
SD30 wrote my husband a letter when he went on a mens retreat, (before we married) it was supposed to be a letter about how much he meant to her. Family & friends were asked to write the letters. Her letter talked about him AND her mom. Then she told him he should think twice about getting married and she said when says think twice, she means think TWICE. She told him he need to "find himself" before jumping into a serious relationship like that. WOW!!!!

He of course told her we were getting married, but we had not set a date. A friend at work had a wedding dress she wanted me to try that was brand new. It was beautiful, so I took it to my sisters and tried it on. My sister mentioned it to my brother, who works with one of my husband's SonIL.
SIL spreads the word. DH gets a call from SD30 late at night, demanding to know if I had a ring on my finger, did I have a dress, she asked him repeatedly, as if he were lying. I was sitting next to him, and heard her and her tone. I was surprised at first but then next day pissed me off.
I confronted her through an email and tried to let her know about boundaries. She never replied to my email but instead called him and told him I sent her an email and said she didn't know what to think about it, that she'd let him read it and see what he thinks. I knew when I didnt hear back from her, she'd called him. So I asked him. He told me, so I said NO I will read you the email MYSELF. She isn't going to go behind my back like that. He said he thought I said nothing wrong.

She got married the same year as we did. She got pregnant by her live in BF and waited until the baby was a year old to get married. But in the months before we got married she'd ask things like, you aren't getting married before "I" am are you?? (we did)
Asking him for a lot of money he didn't have because he gave it all to her mom, whom she didn't ask or get any money from. Told him very little about her own wedding plans of eloping to Jamaica. The $ she wanted was for the blow out reception when she got back. He have her a very modest amount. $1000.
This pissed her off. She told him well you did this for her sister, and that for the other sister!! (yes and that's when he was married to their mom and had the resources to do such) Our own wedding cost less than $1000. and we had no reception.

I decided he and I would just go get married just the two of us, to save drama. I told him I did not want his girls to even know WHEN. We decided on a date and damned if he didn't tell her!!! She kept asking so he told her.
They were told no one was invited except for my husband's elderly mother. I got a snarky text from SD30 that said take plenty of pictures since no one is invited except grandma! Why did she care? She was jealous of me and didn't want him to get married anyway.

At the last minute, just a week or so before the wedding, I had an attack of conscience, and without even telling my husband, emailed and asked all 4 if they wanted to be there? They all said yes. I did it for my husband mostly.
Well day of wedding SD30 calls him crying on his way to the wedding. Selfish bitch.
One daughter lied and said she fell off the porch on her way out to come and sprained her ankle...had her husband call her sister and tell this lie. so she didn't come. We sat there waiting for 25 minutes for her and SD30!!! SD30 finally shows up, comes in, all teary eyed and says she passed up the location and drove way past it, why she is late. Right.
After the ceremony, the photographer took photos of me & DH with his kids and grandkids that came and his mom.
And then some with JUST him and each daughter with their family. Kind of odd now that I think about it. I hired her to take photos of the wedding. Me and my new husband. Any photos should have included us BOTH. But then SD30 grabs photographer by arm and asks her to take a photo of just HER and her dad. Really??? She has NEVER seen that photo, and never will.
Little Miss Insecurity had to get some attention from daddy on my day to show me.
I regret inviting them. If I had it to do over, I would not have.
I won't even get in to the blue FEATHER she wore in her hair to the wedding and the one she put in the hair of granddaughter who stood up with us as "flower girl" (I took it out before the wedding, pissed ST30 off, she is a cosmetologist...she did that crap on purpose) I later asked her if she planned to wear her feather when SHE got married. (no of course not)

I have story after story about this girl over past 5 years. It started before she had even MET me. She was talking about me and how much time her dad and I spent together, and why won't I leave him alone?!

After we were married, she actually owned up to feeling like her dad didn't spend enough time with her...she set out on a plan to ignore him when she came to town to "show him how it feels" she told me. And when I tried to "fix" it, not knowing I could not...it got worse.
I tried to tell him to spend more time with her, go visit her and see her new house out of town (we did) But every time we tried to get with her, she's back out on our plans like it was nothing or put us off.

We went to counseling a few times over HER early on, because he did not see my point of view or see her for what she was. He has come around a lot.
But he will still defend her at times and think I am over reacting and says it "nothing"
Mostly he just doesn't want to talk about it because he knows I won't back down and I will stand up to her.

She has not been home for Christmas in the 4 years we have been married. The first year we made plans, and she wanted us to change them for HER and we could and would not, so she got mad and didnt come. She wanted to go to a Baseball game and it was on night we planned. So she chose the game over her dad.
She does not send him birthday or fathers day cards not does he get gifts.
Only 2 out of 5 Christmas' has she brought gifts for him/us.

The most recent thing, is she was in town last week Monday-Thursday, called him the week before and TOLD him she was coming to town and would see him. Each day, I asked, has she called you? No each day. Finally on the last day, while he was working she called and asked him to meet her to say BYE before she left for home. Really?? She told him she felt like she was being a bad daughter because she had been in town all week and not called or seen him. (hahahaha)
He said he started to not go meet her but he did. On his lunch. For 10 minutes. He saw his two grandkids for 10 minutes. LOL
She intentionally snubs him, then tells him daddy I'm bad and I'm sorry basically. What he wants to hear.
She tells him her mom is having a yard sale and she helped her all week get ready for it. And that she's taking her mom back home with her for awhile.
This comes right with his snubbing. See I love mom! I told him it's not his concern what his ex is doing and his kids need to shut up about her. He agrees but rarely tells them that. Says he will next time. Says he don't comment at all when they mention her.