newbie need assurance that im not a mean woman
hey every one please help heres the problem i have been married for almost 3 years and my husband has a 22 year old bum of a son that lives in our basement,well i guess hes not a bum since he has almost 15,000 in savings because my husband lets him live here for free,he stays out all night and sleeps all day he has a emt lisance but will not get a job because he wants to work in our small town so he want have to move out from where its free, and my husband knows this and still does nothing this boy has told me that he will never move out and the only reason he lives here is because its free,he goes out and buys whatever he wants too a 4 wheeler,a trailer,a 1,000 dollar guitar and any time i say any thing my husband gets mad at me. he says he needs a job before he makes him leave but like i said this mooch has more money than us. please help im about to pack up and let him have this house...
it will never end...
my husband just told me that me or him would leave before he says anything to the mooch. and the mooch hears us and still does nothing. im afraid this is the end of my marrige because i WILL not live unhappy again i did for 13 years and i told my self never again, but i dont work i have a10 year old and nowhere to go my sister lives 45 miles away and both my parents are dead so i guess im stuck here in this hell hole.
So, start charging for your
So, start charging for your chores, cleaning, cooking, etc, thats he needs to pay you and bank that money. WHere there is a will, there is a way - if you want out of that situation you can make a way out of it, it may be hard, but you can do it.
i agree
im goin tommorrow and look for a job, the problem with that is i have noone to watch my daughter while i work. i told him that was what i was going to do and he said that was ok he would do all that his self. i just feel like i have no say at all when it comes to our home my names on the deed too.
yep hes in a fairy tale
i really dont think he cares he told me that he didnt need to buy me out because this was his house first he bought out his 1st wife, if i go stay with my sis i will have to change my daughters school but that may be what i have to do. im just so tired of my husband getting used but i guess he doesnt care so why should i, what really makes me mad is the son knows hes distroing our marrige and he doesnt care. i even suggested making him pay half the bills and husband said no you should never charge your kids to have a home.... i think he just doesnt have the balls to make him leave he doesnt want him mad at him , i told the husband to tell him its all me because i could care less if he likes me or not. he will not stand up to the son but has no problem at all bein a a** to me.
If your
state is a community property one, you own half of the equity from the date you married. Figure out what that is and proceed to have him buy you out or sell it to get your share. It sounds like you also need to get a job. You shouldn't be living with an asshole. Good luck.
our state is not a community property
Tennessee is a property division state, sorry, i live here too. If something is owned before marriage it tends to go to that person. BUT that does not mean you have no rights as to him making things financially even somewhat.You said you are in a samll town that could go for or against you, does your husbadn have it in with any city officials there , if not you should get a fair shake.
I am sorry you are going through this. I really am , marriage just does not seem to be a priority anymore and men like your DH who don't see what they are doing to his son drive me crazy.
"We don't understand life anymore at 40 then at 20, but we know it and admit it" Jules Renard
thanks need2vent i didnt know that
tennessee was that way. im not sure if it will make a differance but we bought the house together when he got divorce they was ordered to sell the house well it never sold and his x was going to let it foreclose which would hurt his credit also so we went a head and bought her out and moved here because i was renting we wasnt married but about 2 months when we got this house my name is one the loan and the deed. then he and his son went to iraq for a year and the son moved in here and hasnt left,he has went to collage saved all his money and lives off us. i but the house on the market this morning because i told hubby that it was that or divorce or make him leave and he told me to sell this one and we will move to a smaller house this one is 5 bedrooms and all we need it about 3 i have a 10 year old and then we will have an office. not really happy to be living in the 1st wives house any ways. i told him that the mooch will never know how to live without daddy paying the bills and getting to blow his money. the son got mad and left this morning because the rteal estate people woke him up he slammed the door and let maybe he will get the hint and move out.
Well its.............
Not your ss your should be upset with lol. Its your husband for allowing it.
Help Im confuse
Hi Im New and I found this site interesting because im a step mother too,Im an asian and i came form this country with no family and no friends,Im 25 years old and my husband is 41 years old and He has a daughter that is 10 years old that talkes back a lot to her father shes disrecting her father after he does everything for her,she tells a lie and it pissed me of because how come a 10 year old kid knows how to lie,I mean Im not from the culture thyey are and its so diffrent to me that until i get confuse and it doesnt make sense,his daughter is a sweet kid in front of him but when it comes to me,shes under estimating me and shes talking back to me calling me names and asking a lot of things that she never even say thank you or can you do this for me,anyone can give me a help with this of how to work out good to be a step mother for her,thank you and more power to this website.God Bless everyone!