If I were you, I would STOP doing ANYTHING for them. If they are that inconsiderate and think that little of you then YOU are also NOT GOOD ENOUGH to cook for them, clean up after them, do their laundry, etc.

We get treated how we ALLOW others to treat us, it might be 3 against 1 but one person CAN make a HUGE difference. Let your voice be heard and let your actions be seen!

This isn't just because you are the SM. I dated a man (engaged) that had twin brothers. The father and the 3 boys treated their mother like crap. I noticed this when I was still about 19. My mother would have ...- well I don't know what my mother would have done because none of us were ever stupid enough to treat her horribly.

This is one of the reasons I did not go ahead with marrying this guy. Their family dynamics were horrible. He's not doing the boys any favors.

Are your finances interwoven? Can you support yourself? If not start spending time now to improve your skills. When there is no respect most guys end up dumping the woman later in life when they find a little stupid cutie.

Ummm...next time you want to watch a show...TELL them 30 minute before that you are watching your show and they can watch or go somewhere else. If he balks then tell him that since he does not respect you enough to share the TV, you won't have the respect to cook for him or anything else you do for him.

I used to feel this way. The Skids would come (once a week and EOWE) and immediately plop down in front of the TV and put on whatever they wanted to watch. And it would be like hours on end marathons of The Office or whatever other show they needed to watch 50 seasons of on Netflix. note- FDH didn't do this but he did go sit with them.

I obviously didn't want to watch endless episodes of the same shows so I would go in my room and watch tv. Also, half the time they were all spread out on the sofas and I would have had to ask someone to move over. Didn't feel very welcome at all.

FDH used to get mad at me and say I was hiding in my room. He couldn't understand why I didn't just join them "as a family". He said that even though HE didn't want to watch those shows, he did because he wanted to spend time with them. I explained to him that I understood that. He's probably happy sitting there watching his kid enjoy herself or just smelling her in his home or whatever other happy thing he got out of it. But they are not my kids and I don't enjoy that. And I don't enjoy having to ask to make space for me on my OWN couch. So I opted for my lonely room. It sucked.

He started changing things around after that. Now, he makes sure we all pick a movie or something together so it's not them monopolizing the TV and isolating me.

I started kicking SS of the Xbox, he's an addict and can get surly if someone makes him stop playing. But I finally did it. I told him to wrap it up because I'm home from work and I need to decompress, or I'm working on the kitchen. Neither SS nor SO gave me any crap about it. Amazingly. But then after about two weeks of this SO allowed SS to move the xbox to his bedroom. Fine with me. School hasn't started yet so well see what happens then.

If he moves it back to the living room I'll be back to kicking him off. You want your kid to have free reign to play Xbox? Then don't put it in my jurisdiction.

Why Are we so unimportant to them? I am just not getting it? Why marry us if they don't care?

I second that. I just don't get it either? Is it sex and another pay check? The negotiations are ongoing for my "rights" to the TV. IF I retreat to ANYWHERE it is seen as "you don't like my kid". Retreating is simply the need to retreat. Don't they understand that these kids can literally TAKE OVER!

THEIR KID, THEY DON'T CARE.
NOT MY KID, NOT MY PROBLEM.

Thank you.

Reading your posts make me feel like I am not crazy. My boyfriend and I are working to sell both our houses and move in together. Just last night the issue of the TV has finally come up just like you guys described. I have my kids 100% of the time and he has his 65%. His are teenagers and it's become that because of them we spend more time at his house. But at his house I feel like I am banished to the small tv in the kitchen or the to bedroom (where I bought him a nice tv for xmas) because they monopolize the big screen tv in the family room with their video games. At my house the main family room is mine and my kids have a seperate room to play their games. The tv there isn't as nice but it's a lot better than I ever had as a kid. When I tried explaining how I was feeling and wanted to talk about how it was going to be when we lived together you would have thought I was crazy for even bringing it up. I asked if we could please put the PS3 in a second family room he has. His reaction was that the 42" tube tv wasn't good enough for playing PS3!!! Most of the games are designed to play in wide screen. My boyfriend doesn't play the PS3 himself but he couldn't make them do that. But he is okay with me watching a 19" TV in the kitchen. He wasn't too happy when I said maybe I should just go home to where I have a nice 55" TV. And where I don't have to clean up after his kids. He can do the cleaning up after them while they play the video games. After I did leave last night he said he understands and will talk to his kids. But somehow I don't really believe it.