How to deal with fighting kids
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My son (10) and SD (8) constantly fight. We blended our family about a year ago and it's only getting worse. They both live with us full time. They bicker over everything and are flat out hateful to each other. I'm exhausted from refereeing them all day and trying to figure out who started it this time so they can be punished.. Is there any other way? I was considering trying putting them both in their rooms for 10 mins any time they fight or tattle, regardless of who "started it" because it seems like they love playing the victim and getting each other in trouble. They both equally go out of their way to annoy each other. Do you think that will work or is it unfair? Any other ideas are greatly apprecaited! Thank you!
Unless they're physical with
Unless they're physical with each other or saying things that should not be said ever to siblings or breaking a rule (like entering someone's room without permission), my mother's advice (with two daughters -- me and my sister -- who fought like cats and dogs) would be TO STAY OUT OF IT.
For your sanity. Because no MATTER what, it will be the adults fault. It always gets turned around, my sister and I were masters at this and ended up mad at our mom for not being fair, etc.
Or you can have dad yell at both of them like my parents did and send us each to our rooms and said that we're grounded from talking to or playing with or going near each other for x amount of hours, which worked because when my dad got mad, he got MAD.
Greenbeans... Bookish I <3
Greenbeans... }:) Bookish I <3 you!
LOL - yeah but what if they
LOL - yeah but what if they decide to use them as weapons? Those cans of greenbeans can leave a nasty dent in the head... }:)
Well I would think if they
Well I would think if they are doing this in order to get the other one into trouble. Then punishing both of them should work for them to realize that they both get into trouble. The only issue I see is that when one really does something wrong the other will feel you do not believe them and will be hurt by that. Kids fight even when they are BIO's, I did with my siblings all the time. All I can say is it may not hurt to try to see what happens.
I say OPEN the green beans,
I say OPEN the green beans, and throw them at them, one at a time.
When my sister and I were
When my sister and I were fighting once, my mom grabbed us each by a pig-tail and bonked our heads together saying, "You want to hurt each other? There! Done!" We both cried and stopped, but started right back up the next day.
I'd say that if it really is constant with the two of them and they are doing it to get each other in trouble, punish them both equally. Not by bonking their heads together, but time out, a chore, writing sentences, picking weeds, etc. Something that they both hate equally.
I gues I better turn myself
I gues I better turn myself in now then.....
Lol you guys are funny! I
Lol you guys are funny! I love this site! Thanks for the quick advice
My mom made us each look at
My mom made us each look at the other person & say, "I don't like it when you....It makes me feel..." and then she made us hug.
I don't know how she managed not to laugh in the process, but it was effective.
ETA: And when she was just tired of the noise, sometimes she would send us to our rooms until she was ready to go through this part.
My kids and stepkid fight all
My kids and stepkid fight all the time, but it's normal "brothers" fights. they are 9, 8 & 6 so they are fairly evenly matched. I'm sick of yelling and screaming too, trust me. A good friend of mine also has 3 boys close to my boys ages. her husband once told me that when his older 2 fight, often he just sits back and lets them duke it out (as long as nobody's getting seriously hurt). When mine fight, nobody ever gets seriously hurt. So, i started taking his advice and on some occasions, just walk away and let them handle it. Most days it works. Good luck!!!