So after about 3 weeks my SD8 still has lice. Her mother was supposed to treat her throughout the week after me and my BF treated her all last weekend. It was exhausting!
I came home today and checked her hair and she still has them! I was so livid because it wasn't taken care of. Her mom did only one treatment. I was so mad, I started ripping into my SD on how this shouldn't of happened. I didn't think about how it wasn't her fault and was displacing my feelings about her mom onto her.
My BF was upset but told me that I over reacted, as usual, and wanted to start yelling at me when I was ripping into my SD. This has been building up for some time. I always seem to be doing the wrong things when it comes to my SD. I focus on the negative, make my BF feel bad about himself, act bitchy all the time because I can be very passive aggressive, and ruin fun times.
The type of person I am started questioning if there is someone else out in the world that would be a better fit for him and her. Would it be better if I just wasn't around. I feel like I'm a bad "stepmom" and would be a bad parent because of recent experiences. I'm very depressed right now. I don't know what to do with myself. I feel like I need to just go away but that will upset BF because he wants me there and involved for some reason...