So last week SD17 made the choice to have herself dropped off at her sister's house, when she already had a ride home. She did not ask to go, assumed that I was going to come and get her. All of the rest of us in the house were extremely sick. She had gone with a friend to do a university visit, so I knew she had a ride home and wasn't worried that she wouldn't have a ride home. For me to drive and pick up SD17 would have entailed at least 20 mins there and 20 mins back. Had she asked I would have told her no.

Now the sister that she went to visit, is SD22, and SD22 and i have basically no relationship at all, and she bad mouths me at every opportunity that she can and I'm excluded from her life -- which I'm okay with except for the fact that every other member of the family goes over to her house and i'm not allowed to. So keep in mind, SD17 is over there while SD17 is texting me over this situation and SD22 is sitting there. So I'm sure that SD22 is ripping on me, and bad mouthing me -- so now I'm an even more terrible person because I won't come and get SD17. Long story short, my DH said he'd come pick her up, even though he was sick if SD22 wouldn't bring her home. No answer from SD17. All of a sudden, SD17 is home. SD22's boyfriend brought her home, and then the boyfriend has the balls to ask for gas money. I made SD17 pay for it since she put herself in the situation of having no ride, and because my DH said he would pick her up -- she just wouldn't respond and say whether or not to pick her up.

So since that time, she has stayed in her bedroom, or her brother's bedroom and only talks to me if she absolutely has to -- like "are you making dinner". At first I got a little upset, and then i thought, why get upset? i don't have to look at her pissy, crabby face. Part of me is upset that she is doing this because I do so much for this little brat and she still treats me this way. She started acting nicer towards me when it got closer to her birthday -- and now i realize why. She wanted me to do stuff for her. Which i did. I'm done. I told my DH last night that I'm not going out of my way to try anymore. And he says well that should endear her to you. Seriously/??? Endear her to me!! Should i continue to try even though she doesn't even want to be around me? If she is in the living room and I come into the living room, she leaves the room and goes to her bedroom or her brother's bedroom.

i did say to her at one point that i didn't deserve to be treated this way -- to be given the silent treatment -- and she said she is not giving me the silent treatment. if this isn't the silent treatment, i don't know what is. But I'm to the point that i feel like I'm done with her. I pointed out this behavior to my DH, and he says "now you don't know that this is what is going on." Come on DH, pull your head out of the sand!! Yet again!!!! Drives me nuts.

I actually felt it happen -- an "I don't care" attitude hit me last night and i thought, 'this is what it feels like" -- disengaging. These kids are vacuums -- all of them. They forget the good things I have done for them, and I have to start fresh each day with them. That kind of relationship is exhausting. I can't do that anymore.

I am seeing my counselor again -- starting next week, to see if she can help me with dealing with these people. I'm off to go get a manicure and pedicure with one ofmy girlfriends -- someone who does love me! i've found that is so important -- surround myself with good people, otherwise I'll go completely insane.

The thing i'm thankful for is that my DH is starting to see how his kids really are --- it's been hard for him to see the reality of them, but been good for me because he sees that i'm not exaggerating.