Oh. Hell. No.

HELL NO! that is insane. Yea her mom buys stuff that she can cook her self so her mom doent have too. Dont do it. I am all for things on special occasions (birthdays, getting an "A" on a test) but you do not have to meet her demands. snack food and deserts are different from entire meals.

To be fair to her, your DH did tell her to write a list...don't be too agitated with her.

I can see why you are seeing red though...originally, my teenage SKids used to make out grocery lists when they visited but I put a stop to that when I told SO that HE could spend HIS money on junk food & that I will not be making a special trip to the store for the malicious creatures that are SO's teenage daughters. They made the list on their own & gave it to me with an attitude though...

I see nothing wrong with your SD eating what you cook & think it's great that you get her her favorite lunch snacks & stuff.

I think the issue is with your DH opening the door like that for your SD who is now going to expect to see chicken tenders on her plate because of what your DH did...hopefully there isn't too much drama that ensues.

Lololol! Poor delusional child. I would be more annoyed with your DH for allowing her to think she has a choice in what you are cooking for dinner. I get requests from time to time from the skids, to which I respond "When you make enough money to buy the groceries, you can buy whatever you want." Or "If you want your mommy's food (i.e., frozen hot pockets), then I'll call her right now to come and get you." The worst is when DH decides it will be fun to take them grocery shopping with us. I just LOVE when they insist that the name brand cereal tastes better than the off-brand. Not to mention the gazillion requests for specific random items I've never even heard of. Sorry kid.

I make different things and give the kids the option to ask for different meals. As for the junk food, don't get it. I do get some junk food, but mostly leave that to DH. BM is a vegetarian health nut so SS actually likes to eat here. And as skinny as he is, he needs the weight. But, if he asked for the list, let him get the stuff and cook it, if she doessn't like what you cook.

SS and DH tried this but I refuse to buy crap food. If it's in the house it will be eaten and it's our job to teach these young people how to be healthy adults...besides I've been gaining weight due to stress and if I cook what the little piggy wants to eat I'll end up looking like his mother.

DH and I know go shopping "tegeather" - meaning that we hit the store in unison and then split: He with his list including cheetos, chips, icecream, chicken nuggets, etc...me to buy what we actually eat. Anything DH buys he is free to keep in his garage fridge for the chosen one and his insane weight gain that DH just doesn't understand.

What gets me is when what I cook isn't good enough...so DH decides that HE wants fast food...when he tells SS for instance "I'm going to taco bell what would you like" - SS replys "I don't like taco bell" - DH says "Oh, okay I'll go to McDonald's too then." This just happened last night and it makes me sick. Here I am scraping pennies, quite literally (from under the dryer yesterday) and he and his spawn are going to multiple fast food locations for a meal after I've cooked one.

I would say "Thanks for the list of SUGGESTIONS. I will bear it in mind." Which is SMspeak for "Not in this lifetime but I thought about it and the answer is still not in this lifetime."

When my SSons and even my kids ask what is for dinner I say "Food"
"What kind of food?"
"Edible food."
"What kind of food?"
"Not dog or cat food"
"Oh come on!"
"Well, when YOU pay for the food and YOU cook it and clena up afterwards, you will know. OK?"

I have been known to splurge on frozen chicken tenders ONLY when they are on sale AND I have a coupon. So throw that back at her. "When XYZ are below $xx.00 and we have a coupon, I will buy it." Hey, it improves math skills and deseminating information and motor skills (because she will have to cut our the coupons..!) With a slight shift of luck to you the coupon will expire the week before the item goes on sale. Hehehehehe

I actually have a small chalk board on the fridge for ANYONE to jot things down on that they want/need from the store. They all know that I may or may not get it.

Usually our list looks like this…and it was usually SS because he could eat us out of house and home. …

Cereal
Ramen
Waffles
Syrup

And so on and so on. I guess I don’t see the big deal here. Dh told her to make the list…and she did.

I find this whole thing so funny! I don't really cook don;t like too never have. However I do make sure we eat. But most of the time since I work nights my dh is in charge of meals as I sleep in and I leave before dinner.

My dh is a normal male and he sends his kids to the store with money to get their own food. I know can imagine what they get right?? But their are his kids not mine.

I make sure that my son has food that I want him to eat so I am covered for my own child. My dd doesn't live here anymore.

We have for the most part thought of our kids that way as his and mine and not together. I am responsible for my kids and he is for his. Of course if I am home and he is not (he works sat morns a lot) I will make sure there is food for the kids and when I am at work dh makes sure my son has food. While not what I would like him to eat most of the time he does feed him.

I will never ever take a list like that and go get the food! I would ask if they would like a 3 legged race to the hospital??? lmao

right I am no ones maid and never will be. too many people in this house for a person that works full time to keep up. They can do things for themselves! }:)

Oh yes, GG (biodad I live with) in the early years demanded what his kids would and would not eat (pretty much 24/7 junk food and fast food. . .even to this day)

I wrote a blog on it "Stupid kid-friendly food requests"

Don't get me started!!! I would have LOVED to tell GG that "they'll eat what's put in front of them," but as the targeted/rejected parent, he'd do a backflip and kiss each individual ass cheek of his spawn so as not to "make waves with the Behemoth" (BM)

GG literally twisted my arm back over a diet coke fiasco where his youngest was being deliberately disobedient and foolish me stepped in to actually PARENT as I did for my two now grown bios!! He demanded that I APOLOGIZE to his then five year old son for taking away a diet coke that he wasn't supposed to have and was deliberately shaking it up to spray the both of us! GG went into a fit of rage at ME, turning purple, spitting and screaming like a drill sergeant at me for DARING to tell his precious "angel" no!!

Keep up the good work and stick to your guns! Don't be a doormat and set boundaries NOW or you will regret it like I do now.

I had a list on the fridge for a while but it fell off and I did not replace it. BD8 asked where the list had gone because she wanted to add something to it. I asked what it was. Chocolate milk. I just smiled. Not going to happen, and BD8 knows it. I buy chocolate milk occasionally as a treat, but it's not a staple that needs to be in the fridge at all time. So I would graciously smile and take the list and buy the hell what I planned to anyway.

I just couldn't...

My DH already knows if he wants something "cute" for SD or if SHE wants something "cute" it's all DH...

I don't have the brain cells...

Luckily, BM can't cook to save her life, so SD devours everything I cook...I keep snacks in the pantry, and DH will oblige her sometimes...DH doesn't allow her to just eat junk though...He nipped that in the bud early, so she knows not to harp on it...

I will look at lists and take them as suggestions. If they are reasonable I try and get the stuff because I like to have the kids involved in the meals. Food and meals are happy times at our house.

I keep a running grocery list on the side of the fridge for requests and suggestions. Everyone knows if they use the last of anything, it needs to go on the list.

I'd take issue with a skid dictating what they want to eat but it shoulds like your DH initiated it in this instance. My skid loves to cook so sometimes she'll pick a recipe from a cookbook and put the ingredients on the list and we'll make it.

DH takes responsibility for cooking and grocery shopping so I pretty much stay out of the day-to-day feeding drama.

I really don't see the problem with that.

I also don't see why you can't tell a kid what's for dinner.

If my hubby asked me what was for dinner, and I responded like that, I don't think that would be very respectful, and I wouldn't expect our relationship to grow appropriately if I were acting like that.

I do 99% of the shopping, so my DH will write out lists of things he wants. I'm not a health nut, but I usually don't like to get most of the stuff that's on there (cokes, chips, frozen things, candy, desserts). I tell him I'll see what I can do, and get him 1 or 2 unhealthy things off the list.

I don't see the problem with doing that for a child. If my skids left a list like that, I'd be happy to get them some junky snacks or even an occasional junky meal.

I've stopped cooking when SD11 is here. She is now responsible for cooking the meal on Saturday night's when she is here. It has given me great insight into how she eats at home. Pretty lousy! Oh, and I completely agree with the you eat what I cook! I'm not a maid for the kid.

So nice to find others in a forum who know exactly how I feel. Try this one out. SD11 smells everything I put in front of her to eat. Last weekend I had enough and told her that if she didn't like it she didn't have to eat anything. She cleaned her plate

My SD is such a picky eater; I could probably count on one hand the number of things she will eat. What kid won't eat mashed potatoes?! She has literally puked on her plate b/c we made her eat vegetables (ooh, SO got sooo mad about that one). I hate to admit it, but we generally just feed her stuff we know she likes so she'll be full, and some form of fruit is included at least once/day. My sister was picky like this as a child too, but grew out of it as she got older, so hopefully SD will do the same.