PLEASE let my life revolve around SD and BM!! Yay!!
Not.
I'm just really irritated right now and need to vent...BM told FH that she was going to pick up SD tomorrow night instead of Sunday morning about 3 weeks ago because her new son's Baptism is early Sunday morning. Great, less time with SD and a free Saturday night are fine with me. My aunt is having a "Dos de Mayo" party tomorrow night (since Cinco de Mayo is on a weeknight) so SD going home after dinner tomorrow is even better cuz FH and I get to go to a party afterwards, have a few margaritas and relax right?
Wrong.
BM drops off SD this afternoon and FH asks her what time she's picking up SD tomorrow...
"What?" she says.
"Aren't you picking her up after dinner tomorrow for your BS's Baptism Sunday?" he asks.
"Oh, oops, I forgot to tell you: the date got changed to a couple weeks from now. And I made plans for tomorrow night so I can't come pick her up. Sorry."
GGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So now my plans are ruined, again (cuz like this is the first time something like this has happened in 2 years right? Ha.)My life and plans just have to revolve around SD and BM and I just have to deal with it right? When do I get to say: "Um, excuse me, FH and I have plans tomorrow night too. You told us WEEKS ago you were picking her up tomorrow and then 'forgot' to tell us plans changed. Not my fault. So you can shove YOUR plans up your ass and come get her like you said you were you dumb beyotch!!" ???? *Sigh* I'm so tired of this.
And before anyone asks: as much as FH would love to go to the party, spending time with the precious princess is MUCH more important to him so thats why HE didn't say that to BM. I am fighting a losing battle.
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i feel so upset
to know that dhs can treat their wifes like this. since day one my fiance has known that i love and adore his son, and that i want nothing but the best for him. therefore, our relationship has always been number one in our household becuase it goes with out saying that the best for ss is already being done and fh and i have so many hills to climb together our relationship has to be strong.
one time it was our day to have him and since daycare was closed (mlk day or something) i had made a play date plan for us because i took off work to watch him. bm calls fh the night before and says that she will watch him instead because she wants to spend time with him, but really she just didnt want him to be with me. fh asks me, and i tell him i already have plans for ss and i. he tells bm, its my day to have him, you will drop him off as planned or i will call the cops and file a report that you are keeping my son from me. that ended it and i had a great day with my ss.
reading these makes me really appreciate my fh for all his love and support, but i wonder were these dhs you all talk about this way in the beginning too, and then changed or have they always put bm and skids first?
Switching
I learned this one after it was done to me ---I ALLOW NO SWITCHING DATES (other than illness).
I am not changing plans so that someone else can be happy. I stood up for myself & even though they still try to switch, my dh just tells them NO.
If dh wants to be with me, he won't switch dates for his x's convenience.
NO WAY NO HOW
Stick up for yourself & don't make exceptions.
Trust me, I'd love to
But I've been told that unless there is a "completely valid reason for it" (and yes, HE gets to decide what is considered "valid") he will never turn down visitation or available time to have his daughter. And according to him, this party is not a "valid" reason to not have the princess for the full time (despite the fact that we...or should I say I since nothing else but the princess matters to him...planned on not having her the full weekend)
If he said that loud and clear
I WOULD NOT STAY WITH A MAN THAT PUTS ME 2ND. He is a good father but a very bad husband/bf. He said it loud and clear----you will be 2nd. The ball is in your court.
Sweetie, find a man that insists that you are number 1.