How do I handle this at this point?
I have posted about this before my in-laws not treating the kids fairly. Both my son's b-days are this month. My oldest sent a few items with links to my in-laws of what he wanted. No big all good and he specifically asked can you get this for my birthday. THey went ahead and bought it all and sent it several weeks ago. Again no big it was some sports gear he could use as he had just started the season.
My husband called to talk to them to make sure that it was clear this was early b-day gifts. They agreed so they knew all this stuff was for the oldest birthday. They sent a card with $100 cash in it for my youngest, about the same amount. Ok great all good. No problems with any of that. We put the money towards a playset.
Today my oldest got a card in the mail from them, to avoid some stuff I kind shook it and figured out there was money in it. Yes I did open it and there was $100 bucks in there for him. Now at this point they sent 100 dollars worth of stuff for my oldest and 100 in cash for his birthday. Everytime they have come up to visit they have gotten stuff for the oldest but not the youngest.
I have asked about this before, we have tried talking to them, tried explain to them how we feel. Even my oldest gets it that they should be fair after we have had to talk to him about this stuff. I have not given the card to the oldest yet.
Please share thoughts and opinions, at this point I am at a loss. I do not talk with them or communicate with them anymore. My husband has been dealing with his parents and he too is getting upset that they are not treating his son's the same.
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They treat your older son differently because they have a
They treat your older son differently because they have a different relationship with him since they basically raised him when he was younger. It is only natural that they feel closer to him. I understand where you are coming from and why you think the kids should be treated the same, but I'm not sure you are ever going to make the grandparents feel the same way as you do.
In this situation, I wonder if they are justifying it because they don't consider the sports equipment birthday gifts, but just gifts? So to them, they sent each child the same amount of money for their birthdays. In any case, it is up to your DH to deal with this. I'm sorry this is still an issue, you would think after this amount of time they would realize you love your son and want what is best for both kids.
I would agree with they would
I would agree with they would not think the equipment was for his birthday but my oldest even told them that he wanted it for his birthday and they could wait till that time to give to him. They went ahead and sent it to him anyway, even though my oldest said wait till his birthday. They don't listen to anyone.
Maybe it is me having a chip on my shoulder, but I literally think they overdo for the oldest partly yes different relationship but a lot because they think we treat him bad. We are too strict and to hard on him. He is so sad living with us because he can never do what he wants. Yes they have literally said that to me.
Just frustrated with the whole thing.