Ughhh, that's the latest with my SD.  I've been so very proud of all her efforts in 'growing-up', especially considering the absolute vile disguting blow my MIL dealt her last year.

I'm still married, for now, I am working on my financial plans at the moment, and for now things are much calmer, which allows me a better headspace to keep up w/my goal/plans for the future.

Anyways, my SD that lives with BM and our grandson, she broke  up w/baby daddy, who moved back out of state to his mommys and of course is job hopping and not paying her proper CS, I ifgured that would be the case.

She studied hard in crash course and got her CNA and started working at a hospital, super proud of her.

Then recently we start hearing about a new guy she is dating, really likes him, has his 'own business'- blah blah....dig more and find out he is 29 (she is 22), had three kids and TWO baby mamma's.  I immediately told her it's a really bad idea, for many reasons.

Then she says he's out of town on some contract work for several months, and they can only talk on the phone once a week, but they are writing letters...( I later tell DH that it sounds like jail lol).   

Then other 'tips' keep ringing alarm bells, he's having custody issues with both, he's going back out of town for a stretch, just generally dropping hints that make you pause (In a way I think it's her way of letting me know w/out outright saying it).

She's showing me pics of the guy the other day. I was babysitting for a few hours and I straight up ask his full name so I can cyber stalk him lol- she laughs and says I do it all the time too....but I asked the name twice, she gives it to me.

Some social media presence but pretty tight, so not much info- then I google....not a background check, and his name pops up, he'd been arrested for Schedule II and Schedule IV posession and trafficking as well as posession of firearm. Great he's a drug dealer!  

I spoke to her dad about it, he was upset but not surprised, BM has had a LIFETIME of dating convicted felons, even as far back that she was corresponding with a felon with letters when they were married.  She lost custody of SD because of her drug involvement and being with the latest felon.  BM went on to clean up her life and started dating a genuingly great guy, whom she got bored of and started getting BACK with the felon who was sent to prison for beating her and destroying her home.

Granted, SD met the guy early this year, and he got arrested a few months after they started dating but still...time to dump and move on girl!

A few days ago I straight up asked her as she was leaving, she said OMG yes, I'll have to tell you about it later this week, his friend set him up (of COURSE)- she begged me not to tell her dad (I already had but didn't tell her that).

Hoping to have another talk w/her soon, the girl is damn smart, street smart mainly, she's ambitious, a go-getter ,she's being responsible w/her job choices and supporting the little guy, she's beautiful but her picker is absolutely rotten (apparently so is mine)- and I realize a lot has to do w/her mothers influence in normalizing dating these kind of people.

I keep hoping this next time he's 'away' and her working at a hospital she sets her aspirations higher and meets a decent guy.  Here I thought the worse was his age and two baby mama's/three kids- and then this???

Her baby daddy is starting to look great in comparison, he's a lazy douche, but he's always been kind and loving to them both (read boring).

The drama never ends ughhh.   Why do I stay involved?  I love her, I love the grandson, regardless of what happens w/her dad and I, I will likely remain in her life to some capacity.  She definately speaks/opens up to me a lot more then her dad.  I'm just upset and dissapointed, she just doesn't see her own value, and sometimes i feel like I'm speaking to myself at the same time.