dgb's Blog
Next step? Breaking my heart!
Some of you may remember my blogs concerning making the mistake of blending my family with two boys,19&17, and his two, daughter 16 and son 21. As you can probably guess, things didn't work out. My 17 yr old son came to me sobbing that he was moving in with his dad. It broke my heart, but I could not force him to stay in such a miserable situation. My SO and his kids moved out into an apartment the first week of May. This was originally HIS idea when he saw how heart broken I was over my son leaving. Well the move didn't happen soon enough before we had a blowout!
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Going after unpaid child support
Here's the situation. My sons are now 17 and 19. The 19 yr old attends college, but still lives here with me. Nine years ago when we got divorced ex was ordered to pay $712/month for child support. I have primary custody and they went to his house every other weekend and a month during the summer. Since 2009, I have been receiving child support sporadically. Sometimes it would be for the right amount, sometimes not.
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Kid's always come first?
If you had it to do over again, would you still have married a man who made it perfectly clear to you that his upper teenagers come first?
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Happy? Tell the truth.
If I had to guess, some of you are married to a spouse who has put his kids first in his life, before you or everything else in his life. For those of you who are in this situation, are you happy or is it a struggle to get through every day knowing that the time you spend with your DH is determined by what his kids are doing that day? In my case, it is his 16 year old daughter and 21 year old son. Daughter is a manipulative troublemaker, and son can take care of himself. We are engaged, but have had to put things on hold for the next 2-3 years until his daughter is out of the house.
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Question......
From a teacher's point of view, why is it that Little Johnny, whose parent's swear in every conference that you've had with them, NEVER does this kind of thing at home, are ALWAYS THE ONLY KIDS THAT ARE MADE TO GO TO SCHOOL THE LAST TWO DAYS OF THE YEAR WHEN EVERYONE ELSE IS AT HOME? It's amazing, but I always can tell who is going to be coming to school every day until the last bell of the year sounds! Oh, and my sympathies to all of you stepmoms who get to stay home with your stepchildren for the summer.
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I FOUND MY RING!!!!
Shortly after SO, his son20, and daughter16 moved into my house I discovered that my tanzanite and diamond ring was missing. I ALWAYS keep my jewelry in a hanging display on the back of my bathroom door. I searched through all of my travel bags, duffel bags, the bathroom floor, drawers, you name it, I looked! I even announced to my household that my ring was missing and asked if anyone had seen it. No one had seen anything. In an effort to help future SD organize her makeup, and God there was a lot of it, I emptied out one of my pretty make-up organizer boxes.
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Fiancee again?
Four weeks after my SO and his son20, daughter16, moved out into their own apartment, I am suddenly introduced to someone by SO as his fiancee? What? Then he tells them that "he was perfectly happy raising his son and daughter instead of dating, until he met me." "Before, he truly didn't know what it was like to really love somebody, that I was the love of his life." SO's son was standing right there when he did it too. I was surprised because he hasn't done that since before they moved out. I still have not spoken to his mini-wife/daughter.
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Being less accommodating....works for me!
So some of you may recall that my SO,his son20 and daughter16, moved out two weekends ago. Yea!!! I have been invited twice now to go see the new apartment, but still am declining. SO went out and bought all new furniture for the apartment and everything else that went in it. Every day all I get is an update on what they went and bought and how helpful son and daughter have been to help get everything done. SO wanted me to go with him Sunday to look at bedroom furniture that would 'eventually be in our bedroom'. I can say that I was less than enthusiastic.
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Re-entry and update to SO moved out but SD still controls his every move
Wasn't sure how to repost my blog, but I added some additional events about what happened over the weekend.
SO moved out but future SD STILL controls his every move!
SO moved out with his daughter16 and son20 last Saturday and Sunday. He essentially put a stop to any bill he contributed to paying while they lived in my house. I'm glad they're out, but SO and I are still trying to have a relationship. Things got REALLY ugly between SD and I while she and her brother were packing everything to move. During SO and my argument, SD thought she was going to get in the middle of it and rescue her dad. I told her to "F--- Off!" I am SO sick of the disrespect and hatefulness of his kids that I blew! My cell phone was on SO's family plan to save money.