I've had an account here before but I'm in the process of getting away from DH so I'm getting brand new everything, including internet presence (since he knew I read this site). 

He just got to be too much. This all started in December when BM called CPS and filed paperwork to reduce DH's visitation and increase his CS. Her intent was to get CPS to say my home was an unfit space for a child but all her complaints were stuff about my children or my house. Like I beat my 14 year old daughter or my toilet doesn't have running water. Except, my daughter is 2 and we mostly put her in time out or pop on the hand. Our toilet did flush slowly but the water would turn over. After some fishing we found a bottle of reflux chewables. She said we didn't feed SD9 because she was snitching (SD got used to eating out and when we pulled in all the money were spending on fast food SD wouldn't eat thinking she would get fast food on the way back to her mom's. She got her uneaten dinner on a paper plate instead). There were some other things but those stood out the most.

CPS investigated and we told the worker what was going on. The complaint was made the same day BM filed her paper work. Not a coincidence at all. CPS closed the case in a week. But I was furious. I had a sense BM was cooking something up but I thought she was going to have SD accuse DH of something. Most of the issues were with me. I told DH he needed to talk to his daughter about this situation. He got mad at me and even defended BM saying that she wouldn't do something like this and if I would let SD have her phone this wouldn't be a problem. I flat out refused the phone. SD had recorded me breast feeding in my home, recorded the toilet, and recorded the laundry room (guess how BM found out about the toilet). 

He even told me I needed to not live my life in fear of CPS. I told him I won't sacrifice my kids for his inablilty to control his issues with SD and BM. I also told him BM is playing with fire with CPS and that SD could wind up in foster care as well. It turned in to a big fight and we've been down hill since then.

I finally had enough when DH came home at 5 AM one morning drunk on my work day. He normally is with the kids in the daytime and didnt get up til 11. Fortunately my brother lives with us and I asked him to take over for the day. I came home on my lunch break and told DH he needed to leave. He left that weekend. It was memorial day weekend.

He's been out the house now for a month and I don't think he's coming back. At least, I'm not holding my breath. He blames me for all his problems, he doesn't want to see his kids with me, and when I ask about his plans, he always says he doesn't know because he doesn't know "if I'm (me) going to change my mind". On July 4th I told him not to worry about it anymore. It doesn't take a month to figure out if you want to be with your wife and kids. I told him bye. It hurts some but he had a ton of other issues as well that I could live with but he just got to be a burden. Everything had to work out in his favor. And as the saying goes: he always wanted the biggest piece of chicken but contributed the least to the meal.

He's currently living with his best friend, a perpetual drunk, and his visitation with SD actually has been reduced but only because he doesnt have anywhere to entertain her all day. I know he is extra sore right now because july was his full month visitstion with SD and I had already told him SD couldn't come to my home. So every day of july is a constant reminder. I. Just. Don't. Care. Not my responsiblility to provide a space for your kid. Writing this down has just proven to be comforting in itself. Thanks for a place to rant.

I told DH if he wanted to get back in the house get a full time job, first, then we can talk about it. I said he lost 'at home/swing shift' privileges when he pulled his stunt. I even found a day care that could take our 2 and 1 on the way for a reasonable price but every cent of his money would be going to daycare and child support. He tried to say something like he would never have money but I welcomed him to the real world on that.

He didn't start off this way. I think living a life not struggling to make ends meet just became 'a right' in his eyes. He is starting to see that the little money he was bringing in is barely enough to support himself.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to the prospect of being without him. I think I was mentally over him way before I was emotionally over him. Is that even possible?