My DH has 4 adult children who live about 4 or 5 hours away from us. He and I have been married just over a year. All is well. For the past couple of years, we had his kids come up for Thanksgiving and we spent Christmas with my family. This year we decided to spend Thanksgiving with my family and have his kids up for Christmas. It looked like it would work out perfectly when we went to visit them in May and they told us that their mother (and her husband) were planning on spending Christmas with her family and that they did not want to go.