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Massive Family Meltdown

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Submitted by imthewife on Sat, 09/15/2012 - 11:34am

Hello! I have not posted since July and since then this whole issue has blown like a nuclear bomb...

My SD is almost 20. She goes away to college; this is her second year.

My sister in laws had become meddlesome during her teen years and bought into all her teen drama and there was a big family issue. Never really settle it...but sister in laws got the message to back off and parent their OWN kids...

MIL's reaction "It's just so sad"...

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Submitted by imthewife on Sun, 07/08/2012 - 6:22pm

SD went off to college last year. She has a dorm, a room at her mom's and HAD a room here until she left for school.

That room became BS3's when she left.

SD will share a room here with BD11 WHEN she is home (about 5 weeks total per year now)...

Because it is (or was) such an issue...I waited for the redecoration. I even let SD use it over xmas break...

I painted it 2 days ago...it is now a nice little boy's room.

I had my inlaws over last night for BD's birthday...along with my family.

Missing the party...too bad so sad...

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Submitted by imthewife on Sun, 07/08/2012 - 5:45pm

A few weeks ago I posted that SD19 will be missing her grandparents 50th wedding anniversary party because she will have just gone back to college out of state...we will drive her out there the week before and she will be one week into school...

We had a major party for their 40th in which the grandkids were not invited. We will spend the entire week with them (including SD) at a family beach house the week before this party...right before SD goes back to college. So she WILL see them...

Why are missed events such an issue?

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Submitted by imthewife on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 12:20pm

My inlaws will celebrate their 50th anniversary in August. Sister in laws, again, are planning the huge bash and don't consult anyone's availability. The party is August 25th.

SD19 returns to college on August 17, out of state, with NO direct and immediate airport around...we drive her there.

Now everyone is starting to freak because precious princess will miss the party....so what...who cares...2 weeks before the party we are ALL at a week long beach house where SD19 will be.

DH had the NERVE to ask me why we "just don't fly her home for the party?"

How long should it take?

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Submitted by imthewife on Wed, 06/27/2012 - 6:16pm

Ok...So SD 19 finished the first year of college just fine...and we are preparing for the second year.

Problem is...she wants to be a nurse. No easy feat in California with the major health systems now requiring a BSRN vs. a 2 year RN license obtained at most community colleges.

Nursing schools also have long wait lists. We found a community college out of state the had no wait...but that 2 year RN license will leave her with no job and the need to go back to school immediately for the bachelors.

I'm with "I hate you"

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Submitted by imthewife on Mon, 06/18/2012 - 11:25pm

Reading blogs about unappreciated step parents and asshole stepkids who look at us like an endless money pit brings me to this....

Hang in there...CS will eventually end. I have been a stepmom for well over a decade...and it' s a sweet day when it ends...

How do we transition?

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Submitted by imthewife on Sun, 06/10/2012 - 1:27pm

SD19 finished her first year of college. She was sent to her mom's out of state to work for the summer because she becomes a "daddy's girl" here and just can never seem to find a job.

OK...so since this kid is almost 20...and will be home for a couple weeks...I am wondering how to transition this visit and all future home from college visits.

Does a child who now considers themself an "adult" (that's funny because she is totally dependent on us) just automatically get included in all of our plans?

What should you provide for a 19 yr. old?

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Submitted by imthewife on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 9:36am

Even though I do work with kids and have child development degrees and pretty much know what I think the answer is...what do you think?

What should a 19 yr. old (and up) kid be provided with?

a free car?
free gas?
free car insurance?
100% tuition paid?
All medical co-pays made?
Should they work?
Should they contribute to their basic needs (clothing, contacts)...extras that THEY want?
Money for social outtings with friends?

Just curious what STers think...

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