DH had been looking forward to an event this evening for a few weeks. It's a one time deal, a certain product dealer is showcasing their products, having a giveaway, offering tips, etc. I knew I had to work that night, but it's not a kid-unfriendly event--quite the opposite actually.

Nah, not the song...

I wish I could wire myself to stop looking back and getting angry all over again about things I can't change.
BM can't be eliminated.
ExH can't be eliminated.
How I wish I could just tell my brain to quit digging up those bones and only look ahead. Most of the time I'm successful, but when I'm not...it just sucks.

Almost 4 weeks to the day of her decision that she loooooved this activity so much that she wanted to go 3 days a week, SD10 had a holy terror tantrum at the gym...melted down to the point that her coach told her mom to take her home. This is an activity where every member of the team is vital for practice and performance, not a solo sport. I saw this coming back when she first started this activity...she never makes it thru a season of anything. At least we hadn't already registered/paid for summer yet.

I used to really love Christmas, getting the house decorated, watching those special (to my family) movies, baking cookies...

Now, I'm done. I have worked my fool tail off to make today special, and I really feel left out, neglected, unappreciated--by the whole family, bios included.

1. I was up until almost 3am because SD10 wouldn't go to sleep, was waking up SS12...I understand that Santa is exciting and all that, but UGH. Santa would have delayed his trip when I was growing up.