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Ever blow up at DH like this?

MadeMyBed's picture

We are fighting, about the SSs of course, and how DH kisses their butts the whole time they'r here, how they lounge around and dont do anything, how I cant get on the computer, TV, etc. when they're here - you know, the usual 7 year long fight.

DH says something like "Its not their fault they live so far from me, its the only time we get to spend together, I cant help their mother is a biatch" and at this point I am so fed up of having the same conversation for 7 years, DH s frustrated of hearng the same conversation for 7 years and I blow up

"ITS YOUR FAULT YOU MARRIED SUCH A BIATCH! IT WASNT AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE! YOU CHOSE HER! yOU CHOSE TO GET MARRIED AND TO HAVE 2 KIDS! EVERYONE IS TIRED OF YOU PLAYING THIS CARD! YOU DID IT!

And it realy kills him when I do this. And I feel horrible. But the cycle continues. I feel like such a bad person. He thinks I despise his kids but I try to explain its like a coach who yells at the kids at sports practice (not like my SSs know of this world, but go with it). The coach wants the kids to do better so they are hard on them. Theough the fact that it is year 7 on this topic of conversation makes me beleive its not getting through.....

Comments

hbell0428's picture

Yes, just did this today and followed up with an e-mail giving specific examples of things I am sick of with him and my SD13 -we have been having this fight for almost 12 Years. You say and do things you never thought you would by nature...
I think after awhile of allowing oursleves to take things; we finally boil over. This in normal and damn doesn't it feel good to say it.. Smile

purpledaisies's picture

Yep sure have to the point I told him that if he didn't start being a dad he can live his kids! I got tired of it real quick! What helped me a lot is that I have 2 kids from a previous divorce and my kids don;t act like his did nor did I coddle them! Every single time I would hear "but they are a product of divorce" I said yeah so is mine and a billion other kids in the world! Your point? Sometimes these men have to have an outsider say something too. Such one time we were in a restaurant and an old lady came up to us and said how wonderful my were and that they were well mannered and if you can just get the others to do the same. And she walked off. You should have seen the look on dh's face! If you could set something like that up perhaps? }:)