SO has a court date for his divorce
The counselor suggested it might be helpful to me to help him prepare for it.
BM is fighting it. She doesn’t want to lose her health insurance that SO is paying for. She feels that he needs to take care of her.
BM has taken to taking swipes at me, because she feels I’m the reason that SO is pushing this.
She’s not wrong, I would have left him.
He also claims to want to marry me, so that again makes it my fault.
She took another jab at me Monday. He was stupid enough to tell me.
I recommended to him that he should talk to SD12 and not bad-mouth BM, but tell SD12 that if she had any questions about what was going on, he was open to talking to her about it.
He took my advice
Then he called to tell me what they discussed.
1. She wants SO and BM to get back together, she only remembers the good times, not the fighting
2. If she can’t have that, she doesn’t want him to have a girlfriend. He doesn’t give her enough attention when he’s got one.
3. BM has been telling SD12 that SO is telling SD12 things that aren’t true. Like BM is a bad mom. (if he has, it’s not in front of me.)
After that awesome review of the conversation with SD12, that did nothing but hurt me, since I’ve put so much into the relationship with SD12. I said, “She’s still jealous of me. I thought we had moved past that”
To which I got rebuffed
So I fixated on the fact that I wasn't allowed to have feelings and voice them about this.
To which I was told that why couldn’t I just listen for once. I was fixating on an insignificant part of the conversation. Especially after he just had a good talk with his daughter. (what part of that was good)
After that, I tried making my point, but couldn’t, because SO was talking over me, yet again, for the third time.
Realizing I was starting to get pulled into it, I told him Goodnight and hung up on him while he was telling me that I knew I was wrong.
That was Monday and neither of us have tried to contact each other.
I made an appt. with the therapist for tomorrow
I just called SO a couple mins ago to tell him about it and tell him it was up to him if he went, he didn’t answer, I left it on his voicemail.

Quite honestly, I’m on the cliff of jumping out of this relationship. If he can’t respect me enough to listen to what I have to say (whether I’m right or wrong), after I’ve had to listen to him tell me that I focused on an insignificant part of their conversation, then there’s not a point in continuing this relationship. Without communication, you can’t fix anything.