Just venting
Just when I thought all was going well bm goes nutcase on me. On friday my hubby got off work an hour early and decided to go pick up his son from daycare at 3 pm instead of the court ordered time of 4pm. We really didn't think it was a big deal. SO today I'm sitting here at work and 'she' calls screaming/cussing me out. How dare we do that without her permission and all kinds of nonsense. I calmly said, "It is inappropriate for you to call me at work in such a confrontational and hostile mannor. When you can speak to me in a civil mannor I will discuss this further with you." And I hung up. ARRRRRRRhhhhhh!!!! Just venting 
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The best way
Perfect response from you. We use to get the same thing from the BM, calling, screaming, hanging up. My husband bought into the behavior, tried to calm her down, explain, that never worked. The few times that I spoke with her I behaved in your fashion and it either deescalates the situation or they hang up. High drama types cannot stand calm & reason; they are not getting the response from you that they want. Also, I enjoyed every minute of thwarting her histrionic game.
Glynne
Good for you
You go girl.
I swear it is comicial at times. Over picking up an hour early. Come on, that is so rediculous, it's funny.
And you handled her call flawlessly.
How you feeling Skye?
I'm feeling pregnant Week
I'm feeling pregnant
Week 26 is really working me. I can't stop peeing..... But other than that great. Thanks for asking
Oh dear
Skye22, I was so happy for you that things were calm for you lately as far as BM goes. It's so strange that she would suddenly get all bent out of shape over something so trivial. I know you said she made your first pregnancy hell and I had really hoped that this time around would be different. Is there anything else going on lately that would set her off? It just baffles me that this is what she chooses to blow up over. I feel like there must be more to the story.
If it makes you feel any better, we arrived 25 minutes early to pick up SD last Friday because traffic wasn't bad for once and we called their apartment and SD answered and said excitedly "I'll be right down!" Then I could hear BM in the background saying "you're not going down until 6pm!!! Tell your father that he will have to wait!" It was for no other reason but to make us wait in the parking lot. It's just a control game. When we arrive dead on 6pm, BM still keeps us waiting, sometimes up to a half an hour. For example, she sends SD to say goodbye to her grandfather for 15 minutes, she tells SD to get her homework together and pack her medicine, etc. when all these things should have taken place before we arrived. So at least this way, we still had to wait, but we got SD *at* 6pm like the court order states, and not 6:15/6:30. We played outside with our little one and had a grand ol' time. It was harder in the winter when it was too cold to play outside and we'd be stuck in the car with a screaming baby. So irritating.
Good luck with this. You handled yourself perfectly, by the way. Kudos!
she just doesn't have a
she just doesn't have a life...that's why most of these ex/biomom are so out of control. they have nothing better else to do but cause trouble and make little things a big thing. insecure, jealousy, no common sense, NO LIFE is the reason for it. glad you handled that pretty well and yes do hang up on her for being rude over the phone. just think that you are better off than her and happier, don't let her stupidity get to you. it' kills her that you are calm & nice.
-happy mom
What is so funny is
If everyone would look at their visitation orders, it actually states a specific time, day and maybe place for pick up and drop off but what the Bio Parent forgets is THIS IS NOT STONE, it specifcally states in almost every single order IF THE PARENTS CANNOT AGREE! Therefore, 4pm, 5pm, 6pm, 8pm, DOES NOT HAVE TO BE THE STANDARD YOU MORON, WE as the Parents do get to decide when we would like to pick up and return our kids, all we have to do is AGREE!
I swear some of the custodials take the time issue too far! Its there as a guide NOT as the LAW unless we are too stupid to actually put the child 1st, oh yeah that's right!
"Be there for the joy. Be there for the tears. Be there for each other."
(Step-Mom the Movie 1998)
You're a better woman than me, skye22.
My response would've been, "I'm sorry, but as an expectant mother, I really don't need to be subjected to this kind of stress. You'll need to take this up with my husband." CLICK. I'd have been juvenile enough to go for the little dig.
Just wait until you sneeze at 38 weeks.
~ Anne ~
Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: Pull down your pants and slide on the ice! -M*A*S*H (Sidney Freedman to the OR staff on dealing with stress)
That is great! I wish I was
That is great! I wish I was quick witted enough to think of that myself
And the saga
And the saga continues....
This woman is something else. So she decided to fax me a letter at work yesterday afternoon. She wanted to let me know that she called my ss school office, his teacher directly and the afterschool daycare program to make sure a note was on file that we (my husband - the childs father and I) Are not allowed anywhere near the school anymore. What a nutcase! I was really really upset that she blew this all out of porportion. We were informed that we no longer have permission from her to be on the school permises and if we are seen they (whoever that is) will take appropriate action. Like we are going to kidnap the child or something. So now we are to meet at ahi parking lot that she has chosen at 6pm instead of 4pm on fridays. We haven't responded yet and I really don't know what to say to this idiocracy. And the worst part is last night we had ss for our weekly tuesday visit. The first thing that he said when he got in the car is 'my mommy is really really mad at you guys' Why does she feel the need to bring him into her chaos..... I really just don't get it.
That's sad.
BM is clearly nuts. A Control Freak. I'm sorry for that. But the poor kid. To say that. Over a half an hour early, now God forbid you go near the school. That's so stupid. What if you wanted to go to a school event?
Oh Skye, hang in there girl. Glad you are feeling well. I'll never forget being 8 and 9 months along. I would run a marathon to get to the bathroom just to produce a freaken teaspoon. But what a joy to make a person.
Thanks for the support. I
Thanks for the support. I just have to blow it off. I've got bigger and better fish to fry right now, if you know what I mean
She want total control, let her have it cause I'm not going to fight with her. My husband and I are very blessed and happy and nothing she can throw at us will change that 
To her disappointment, I'm sure.
You know the thing is she
You know the thing is she could have just asked us not to pick him up again until the 4pm court ordered time and we would have agreed. I mean we wouldn't understand why being a little early matters but we would have respected her wishes anyways. Why she had to act this way is beyond me.
There are just some miserable (crazy in this case) people in thi
WOW.... seems as if the ex has overreacted!!! I'd hate to know what she would've done if you HADN'T picked up your ss at all. (now that's a reason to go to the extremes you have described you are going through.) If it's court ordered, then how can she change anything on her own? She may have caused more problems for herself than she realizes. What if an "emergency" arises on her part & she needs either 1 of you to pick up your ss? With all that she has done, she will have her hands tied, won't she? I'd be interested in how this all turns out. Keep us posted!
What doesn't kill you, will make you stronger!
I told BF about this one last night.
BF knowsabout this site. And I do share some of the days events with him. Skye, I told him about the hell you caught over picking up 1/2 an hour early. He just shook his head, he couldn't believe it.
And now that I think about it, I wonder if my BF's hesitation to stand up to her comes from the fear that if he does, the situation will become rediculously stupid. No offense, but like yours.
You know at first I was
You know at first I was fumming. For a minute I thought I might actually breath fire but today its more comical than anything. Just another story for the books. I am just glad that I held my composure with her. I really feel I took control back from her by not rolling in the mud with her...... I mean it sucks but what can you do
That's how I manage too
I just laugh. It is sooo not worth compromising your health and that of your unborn child to fume over it. So have a good laugh at how childish and pathetic her behavior is. I got to giggling so hard the other day at BM's ridiculousness at SD's swim banquet, that the other family sitting at the table with us asked me what was so funny. I just said it was an inside joke or something because I certainly couldn't go into detail with them!
Skye22, I'm proud of you for holding your composure too! I hope that if I ever have any ugly confrontations with BM that I will behave with as much class as you! Luckily, all of our BM crap comes in the form of emails, faxes or phone calls directly to my fiance so I have never been put in such a position but I'm sure I will be at some point. There will be the day that we have a family therapy session together and I'm sure she'll hurl accusations at both of us and I will have to practice some EXTREME self control, but I will model myself after you!
1 hour..
Can you say total Control Freak? I can..
She uses her son as her "robot".. And she expects you and dad to jump thru her hoops. you did the right thing by saying what you did.. ANd further more its not you who picked him up early it was your hubby so calling you screaming is crazy. Now I can certainly say I probably personally would have went off on her "control freak" butt.. But that is just my mood.
Just remember when the its calm that only means its about to storm.. LOL>. They always say the calm before the storm!!! Next time it gets calm.. And make sure her butt sticks to the decree.. Even if it is something little.. or you can be the bigger person .. LOL
Happy
" make sure you tell the people you love most EVERYDAY.. Its important not only for them to know but for you to tell.. Life is to short to be miserable..
Tomorrow is the big day. We
Tomorrow is the big day. We told biomom that we do not agree to change the court ordered time of 4pm to 6pm. ANd that if she does not have him at the exchange spot at 4pm we are driving directly to the court house and filing a contempt of court paperwork.....
Haven't heard a response. ANd hoping that she has gotten over her power trip and realised that we mean business. We are really hoping that she doesn't play any games and just does what she is suppose to instead of trying to cause more problems. I guess we will see soon enough. Wish us luck, we'll need it
Good luck!
I'll be thinking of you!
Good luck Skye
That's great. I love it. Very direct. It's just sad that these things have to go on.
I'm with Cait, I'll be thinking of ya. Best wishes. Keep us posted.
Jo
Oh I am thinkin gof ya..
And am very happy that you are sticking to your guns..
Happy
" make sure you tell the people you love most EVERYDAY.. Its important not only for them to know but for you to tell.. Life is to short to be miserable..