QUESTION
Just got letter from bm regarding all the activities she has enrolled ss in for the summer. THey are EVERY night! This just seems like A LOT to me. And I seriously can't be a spectatior every night of the week for the next 3 months straight. I'm 8 months pregnant for one. And secondly it feels like she is setting us up to fail. Becasue she has no life outside of 'timmy', no other children or a spouse. BUt We do have other commitments and I don't want to feel guilty about not being able to put my whole life and other childrens lives on hold. I guess my question is: Is it wrong to pick one or two events each week to go to instead of ALL of them? I mean good lord.... I want to be there for the kid but this is excessive.
monday swimming classes
tuesday our nightly visit w/ ss
wednesday hockey lessons
thursday rock climbing lessons
friday basketball camp
- skye22's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
When I was a kid..
When I was a kid, my parents didn't attend all of my events.. heck, they barely attended the "big" ones. Little "timmy" isn't going to suffer if you can't make them all, and it's unrealistic for you or BM to expect that you will. Make the ones you can and don't sweat the rest!
Stepup
I'm just afraid that he will
I'm just afraid that he will feel bad. Especially when she will be at everything and that makes her look like the hero and us like uninvolved deadbeats or something. Maybe I'm just being to critical of myself. It's just we have never missed a single game or pratice of any kind. But this is just far too much. And I almost fear that she may burn him out by overdoing it....... I just don't want him wondering if we are going to be there everynight or not. Maybe I should go thru and pick the days and events that we can make and give him a little calander that way he knows which days we are coming and isn't left feeling bad when we don't. What do you think?
Unreasonable expectations
You cannot be expected to be at all of them. Pick which ones you'll attend.
I missed most of SS's first and third hockey seasons. There was no way I was going to bring a small infant to outdoor hockey games in 10 degree weather. SS understood. I was at all of the indoor games (though they only played a few). It made it that much more special when I did attend.
Tell your ss you're excited to see him on A and B nights. Then he'll know in advance that you won't be there on X,Y, and Z nights. Once baby comes, it will be impossible to keep up with daily activities. Better he knows how it will be up front.
Agreed
I love my SS's but now way would I have taken my infant son out every night. He's 9 months now and I STILL don't do that. I explain to my SS's that I'm going to rest at home so I can the best mommy I can be for them. I do make the major events but certainly not ALL of them.
IF IT WAS EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT.
Ya, I'm expecting to be
Ya, I'm expecting to be pretty busy with a 22 month old and a newborn.....
Oh, I forgot to mention that
Oh, I forgot to mention that these are just the evening activities...
she has him in a few other things during the day like tennis lessons and a painting class....
Babysitting...
That's what it is... she's using it as a babysitter. My concern is the child in all of this. Does he really want to be involved with all these activities?!?!?! Man, this poor kid is going to be sooo exhausted, and burnt out before you know it. You know, I think that you might want to have a chat with this little fellow and found out what he REALLY is interested in. Then, if you can't make it to everything, especially when he is with you guys, take a break FOR HIM. He's going to need it.
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...