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How to be a perfect stepmother

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Thu, 04/02/2020 - 3:32pm

I posted this as a comment on a forum posting and then decided I wanted to share my thoughts more broadly on "how to be a perfect stepmother". Would love to hear what others think...

TL;dr - The secret to being a perfect stepmom is to realize that you have no needs, you don't matter. You exist to make up for all the mistakes that DH and BM made. You also exist to be the scapegoat for all the mistakes DH and BM continue to make. 

Like Clockwork...here comes the crazy!

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Fri, 03/27/2020 - 5:00pm

On Monday, DH contacted BM and said that because he's immune-compromised, he would prefer that SKids not come to our home if they are having symptoms or anyone in her home is having symptoms. BM replied and said that she thought it was best if they didn't switch at all. It all seemed so easy....and DH and I both commented that BM must be up to something. 

BM is such an idiot - COVID 19 edition

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Thu, 03/19/2020 - 10:53pm

We live at one of the epicenters of COVID-19 - schools are closed, restaurants are closed, churches are closed, no gatherings over 50 people, gatherings under 50 people must demonstrate they meet public health guidelines. We are averaging about 230 new confirmed cases a day. Not on lockdown, yet, but we probably should be. DH is freaking out because he can't work remotely and he's convinced he's being exposed at work.

BM demands DH let kids stay with us for weeks

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Fri, 03/13/2020 - 11:43pm

Less than a week after telling DH that he's a terrible father who doesn't care about his children, BM let's DH know that Skids school is likely to close and she thinks DH and I should have to share the burden. She starts by saying that she's working remotely. Also, Skids are teens who don't need babysitting. How is this different from summer, when they stay with her? Because she'll be annoyed by them? Because she and her DH want to travel? It is unclear.

BM demands money for college

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Tue, 03/10/2020 - 2:42pm

SSs aren't even in high school, yet, but today, BM demanded money for college. It doesn't matter to her neither kid is college material. One has Ds in all of his core course, the other has As and Bs, but his grades are all "modified" due to BM's claim that he has OCD caused by grade anxiety. Both score at "below grade level" on the state math and reading assessments. One is well below grade-level. 

BM needs a favor...

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Mon, 02/10/2020 - 10:50pm

If you read my last blog, you know that DH was recently hospitalized. When he messaged BM via Our Family Wizard from the emergency room to say he was being admitted to the hospital and MIL was busy that weekend, so he would not be able to take Skids that weekend, her response was to tell DH that he owed her money for her (*cough* non-existent) plans because he didn't give her the "required 24 hours notice". 

Today, DH gets a long message from BM - also through Our Family Wizard. I'll paraphrase, because it was quite long: 

BM can even make DH's hospital stay about her...

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Fri, 01/31/2020 - 2:35am

DH was admitted to the hospital this evening. He's having a very bad reaction to some medication he was taking. So bad that that he was triaged in through the emergency room right away and the ER doctors contacted the large hospital in the big city near us to get an opinion on whether or not he should be transferred. I cried on my whole drive home from work because I was so worried about him. 

glitter bombed, likely by BM

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Tue, 01/07/2020 - 2:17pm

DH recently received a "glitter bomb" in the mail...an anonymous tube that spews glitter everywhere when opened. I wish I had opened the package, because I don't think I would have opened the anonymously sent tube. However, because DH's name was on it, he said 'what's this?" and then pink glitter was everywhere. It was sent by a company that allows you to send anonymous "pranks" to "your enemies." 

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