do I really have to put up with this crap for another 9 months...
The disrespect is continuing at our house, every day it gets more and more ridiculous. SD17 called me step-bitch and said when she moves out she is never going to talk to me again. DH did NOTHING and when I got pissed off about the whole thing, DH said there is nothing he can do, and asked me what I would do if I was in his situation. Honestly, I didn't know what to say. I would never have this kind of guilt parenting relationship with one of my own. I am tired of SD17 showing the BD12 and BS6 that its ok to disrespect me and NOTHING happens. I know I posted about this before but SD17 turns 18 in December, half way through her senior year. I am OVER IT! I want her out! I am sick of footing the bill for this one , just to be treated the way I am. I know many of you thought I had a moral obligation to deal with it for another six months. The way I see it, I have a moral obligation to be a good mother to MY children, to raise them the way I want them raised and not have them surrounded by the disrepectful attitude every day. We live in FL and she reaches age of majority at 18, the BM was ordered to pay DH child support until graduation, and I honestly think that is why he refuses to kick her out when she turns 18, because of the money. I could give a RATS ASS about her money! It has never been in the budget and never will be. It was always additional money we NEVER relied on. Am I really a horrible person if I insist she move out when she turns 18?
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IMO, nope...I have been
IMO, nope...I have been there on many occasions with SDstb18...I even researched the law here and found out that even though she is still in school, she can be asked to leave our home at 18. Now, being as the BM is nowhere to be found, her attitude has become much better, as she really has no where else to go. I think if yur DH put her in her place and lets her know that her being asked to leave is a real possibility, maybe her attitude will change. I feel for u...let her go live with the BM if her attitude doesn't change quickly!!!
A mother is not defined by the "b" or the "s" in front of her name, she is defined by how she handles the "mother" part.....
My SD will be 17 tomorrow. I
My SD will be 17 tomorrow. I have one year and one day. I have thought about this, because I will have 8 months after she turns 18 before she is done with school (well hopefully!). I plan on allowing her to finish school, if and ONLY if her attitude doesn't turn into "I am 18, I don't have to listen to anyone". I can betcha that is what happens though. She already doesn't think she has to listen to anyone, and what 18yr old doesn't have a "little" bit of that attitude? WRONG... MY house... MY rules... Listen or LEAVE.
The thing is once she turns 18... don't care what HER, or DADDY, or MOMMY thinks... so I will just tell her OFF and tell her to LEAVE. I have no plans on telling her to leave on her eighteenth birthday, but I have BIG plans for not holding my tongue ANYMORE the day AFTER!
"I will not take responsibility, where I do not have authority." ~ MeanOleMe
Problem is DH and I both
Problem is DH and I both already sat down with her and told her that she will be moving out if her attitude doesnt change. That was 2 months ago. She already pulled the "I will be 18, I can do whatever I want" line with us and the BM. My problem is DH doesnt want to follow through, asked me how she would get to school and get to work etc. So I asked DH why he even told her that, and he said it was a scare tactic that he hoped would change her attitude. So the only way this will happen is if I push the issue. I sitll think its the child support issue, even if DH doesnt want to admit it.
If you and DH already
If you and DH already discussed it, and her attitude doesn't change... tell her she has to leave. He already agreed to it... meaning it or not. Maybe you could get DH to agree to make her sign a last chance agreement. The "contract" states everything you expect while she is living in YOUR house. If she doesn't agree tell her to get out. Don't even involve DH.. He will sign it as well. They both agreed to it.. so no reason he needs to be involved when she breaks the contract and you have to tell her to leave.
"I will not take responsibility, where I do not have authority." ~ MeanOleMe
Your husband already agreed
Your husband already agreed to it. And i was called a stepbitch i would have told her off on the spot, packed her bags and booted her little ass out the door in front of her father. NO ONE calls me that. I wont tolerate crap from no one!!!! I would tell your dh to get a pair of balls soon because since he did nothign , you will do it now.
You dont have to wait for 9 months. Tell to make plans by the weekend and start shipping her out.
Tell your dh she is going and he has already agreed to it because of her attitude.
Wow....I could have written
Wow....I could have written your blog! My SD17 just moved out b/c she didn't want to follow our rules. Read through some of my old blogs, they might help you..... Good luck, I have been fighting that battle for YEARS!
"Honestly, I didn't know
"Honestly, I didn't know what to say."
He should say "don't you EVER talk to my wife that way. You don't have to love or even like her BUT you WILL show her respect. Do you realize that example you are to the other children? You are scarying and upseting them---I am not having it anymore. You don't want to talk to her when you get out---fine---but while you live here you will show all us respect."