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When openening your heart and home goes WRONG!!!

FEELINGUSED's picture

Submitted by FEELINGUSED on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 1:17pm

After accepting my sd11 into my and my son's life and caring for her , nurturing her unconditionally, even after she lied on my son (it was proven in court) encouraged by her bm, I now learn that she is now lying again on me and about things in our home, again, encouraged by her bm who is trying to regain custody of her. But this time I am being proactive in the situation. Because she admitted that she lied on me to her mother and also told her that she does not like it at our house, I told her that she should not enjoy any of the things that I the mean person has contributed to her, so I took everything that I ever gave her including T.V., game systems, clothes, etc. I told her that I would spare her the real unfortune of having her sleep on the floor like she did at her mothers and let her keep the bed. I told my dh that I would feed her and make sure she gets to school when he can't take her, other wise, I want nothing to do with her. A lying child is a dangerous child, and a lying child with a equally lying influenial crazy mother who is grasping at anything is doubly dangerous. The child does need professional help, but I want her out of my house.

Comments

Totalybogus's picture

Submitted by Totalybogus on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 1:25pm

I can't blame you. She would have been out the first time if it was something that had to go to court about my child. If not, then we would be out the door.

now4teens's picture

Submitted by now4teens on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 1:28pm

Wow, what a SAD situation! I feel truly sorry for both you and your son.

So how is your DH reacting to all of this- his daughter lying, his ex encouraging her to lie, and your reaction to all the lies?

"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"

life84's picture

Submitted by life84 on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 1:49pm

I totally agree with the way you handled the situation. I know SD is crying now. Even though a child she has to learn that they're consequences for all actions and if she feels that lying on you and your son, and the fact that the whole lying thing with your son went all the way to court, is a way to gain some sort of satisfaction, or a way out of your house then she has another thing coming. I would have taken everything back from her too. Way to go feelingused.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 3:25pm

We apparently share a skid. That is pretty much what happened with DH and I when he received custody of step-demon. She lied, she cheated, she made reports to UberSkank, she purposely failed school and she constantly defied DH.

After she moved back with UberSkank.....I went into her room and removed MY television and replaced it with her old crappy one, I took MY dvd player and she now has to use her old PS that only works half the time and I took back MY framed Humane Society poster (very nice artwork and she is an animal lover) and put it back into my office. I left the bed because I didn't have another room available.

I no longer do anything for her, plan special meals or go out of my way for her. Why waste my precious time?

“Be like a duck. Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath.”
Michael Caine

Conflicted's picture

Submitted by Conflicted on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 5:05pm

This is horrible..... I was in a horrible situation with my ex-dh's daughter (former SD). SHE, at 8-years-old and along with her mother's influence accused my bio son (10) of molesting her.... stood by her story through the court appearances, statements to CPS, counseling sessions.... 8 months later she let it slip (should have seen the look on her face when that one slipped out).... The truth finally came out.... 8 months later.... after my poor kid was interrogated by the police and cps.... after I questioned my own son as a person.... after he was banned from spending the night in our home if SD were scheduled to be there.... AFTER the damage was done she admitted it was all a lie.... guess what former dh did about it?..... NOTHING! NADA! ZILCH!

Unless you count screwing my 'best friend'....

Sorry ladies.... REALLY bad day and this post rubs me wrong. I feel for you friend, I would do all that you can to get that child out of your home before she destroys the life of one of your own.

I don't know what she said about your son but I do know that her lies will escalate and someone will get hurt.... GET HER OUT!

fedupstepdad's picture

Submitted by fedupstepdad on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 5:16pm

My darling SD has been taught by her BD that "if you believe it, then it's not a lie!" A theory which she proved in court by lying to our face about what she was going to tell the judge (which was that she wanted to have custody changed) and telling the judge that she wanted the custody to go back to the way it use to be (my wife had temporary full custody due to CPS being called on her BD for mental/physical abuse, which the investigator said never happened, even though SD told the teacher, counselor, therapist and anyone who would listen what was happening). Needless to say when we went back to court and the judge said the SD told her she was fine and wanted to go back to her fathers we were crushed. My poor wife, the betrayal! I decided from that point forward to disengage from her. If she can do that to her MOM imagine what she could do to me or my kids. Take care of YOUR family.

Most Evil's picture

Submitted by Most Evil on Tue, 10/27/2009 - 6:34pm

I am so sorry that happened. It hurts to be betrayed like that!! I don't blame you one bit, and I hope SD regrets it and learns a lesson from this - don't screw with your stepmom-!!!! Smile just trying to get a smile out of you Wink

It reminds me of a drawing I want to make of my SD18: smile on face, one hand stuck out asking for money, the other hand with a knife in it stabbing me and DH in the back! unfortunate but true.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think."
Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)