Poll ... would you believe what your skids believe?
Sorry to be a blog hog, but I'm having a hard time today.
In SD's letter, she mentions several times that she KNOWS DH doesn't love me and is staying for the kids.
As I'm sure the skids of many of the bloggers on this site have their opinions of our marriages/relationships, the question comes to mind: would you believe what the skids say about your relationship? Would you believe your DH/SO if they denied a lack of love? With the question out there hanging in the air, is there any way to live without any doubt of DH's love?
- stepoff's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
That is a tough question...I
That is a tough question...I don't have any answers but to follow your heart...sounds more like this girl can't accept the fact that her father loves you so she is in denial of it...JMO
<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>
to your SD she may see that
to your SD she may see that as truth, she may want to believe that he has NO feelings for you so any shred or any statement that could be left open to interpretation she takes a validating this "idea" of hers. It may come down to perception, each persons perception is their own truth.
how do you believe your husband feels about your marriage..? that is what I would put more weight on, very few parents would ever discuss their personal feelings about a spouse with a child.
I guess that would depend on
I guess that would depend on the issue. About his feelings for me? Likely not. However, if they are SANE (pls note the sane part) adults, and kept repeating a statement, I'd want to know WHY they are saying it, they try to get to the bottom of it.
I never believe a WORD that comes out of SD20's mouth, nothing is ever the truth.
My SD was in her early 20s
My SD was in her early 20s when DH and I got married. She was just SURE that he was marrying me so he didn't have to be alone. That was her reality. He told SD that, no, he really does love me. I'm sure that was hard for her to hear. She was always polite to me, and now we get along well. She's become a lovely young woman. There's hope!
How your DH treats you is what's important, not what a confused skid says.
I think you know in your
I think you know in your heart if you are honest with yourself how your relationship stands. Your SD believe's what she wants to believe. Only you and your DH can know for sure. Everyone in a normal relationhsip has doubts about things but if they are passing and not consistent nagging doubts and your relationhisp is healthy then it's just that - normal.
My DH got a similar letter from his DD (16 at the time). She claimed to know everything about our life, our parenting skills, how we treat SD(her 1/2 sister), and most importantly how all her dad's future relationships would turn out.
I believe she is upset because he seems happy. It really is the best revenge.
When DH and I first moved in
When DH and I first moved in together SS told me that his daddy just had me around to cook and clean and that DH still loved BM. LMAO!!!
no i wouldnt believe the sd
no i wouldnt believe the sd because you dont know what the bm is filling her head with im in the boat my sd says the same thing but her bm fills her head with things the bm even tells sd that her bd doesnt love or want her not true he never step out of his daughters life like her bm did for a year and a half
'SD and BM likely have major
'SD and BM likely have major bitch sessions about your marriage.'
I know they do. When she would come to visit her dad at our home, a sh!t storm would ensue shortly after. I know that she was going home and telling her mother of all the remodeling we were doing and the nicer things that we have in our home. I think she was/is jealous of our home and our family. She mentioned that 'mom doesn't have much money'. Well, she's kinda po'ed that we have a nice place to live. I think she sees our boys and our life here and is so angry that her parents split up and she didn't get to have that happy family through her teenage years, and BM feels the same.
Thanks stepping!
Your SD doesn't want him to
Your SD doesn't want him to love you because of how she feels about you. But it's a smoke screen and hopefully DH can see through it.
Six months ago my DH, SD(26) coddled and an only child, and I had a meeting about issues in the household. Apparently she'd gone to him complaining about me regarding different issues and he told her "you just don't like Shannon". SD then told me "he always sticks up for you and he loves you."
Well shucks now ain't that cute . . .he married me so that's the natural order of things. Did she think I put some type of hoo doo hex on him or something and that he'd dump me if she complained about me? WTF.
At this point, she has stopped all of her complaining, and other foolishness because she knows that no matter what she says or how she feels about me, it's not going to change his love for me. Nor will he be foolish enough to end his marriage based on her feelings about me. The only opinions that matter in this house are mine and his. So no her feelings don't count!
I agree. Stepoff, has DH
I agree.
Stepoff, has DH ever told her that "you're my daughter and I'll always love you, but stepoff comes first?" Has he ever suggested that she get counseling, and that he'd be willing to go to some of her sessions?
LOL Anon! I just suggested
LOL Anon! I just suggested that to him this morning. I really think that SD needs counseling to get over the divorce that happened 7 YEARS AGO. It's obvious she hasn't moved past it, and I fear that she never will until she gets an unbiased 3rd party opinion about her behavior. She is emotionally stuck at age 13 when her parents split.
And no, I don't think he ever told her that I come first. But I don't know for sure. I just can't see him saying that to her because it would hurt her feelings, and he does everything he can to avoid that.
I don't believe anything my
I don't believe anything my youngest SS tells me or my husband. He's lied too many times. I ignore most of what he says and if its something I have to take action on I verify it. When he said he had a job and needed gas money I made him turn on his car and show me where the gas gage was and I also drove past his employer to make sure he was indeed there. My ss would tell any lie if it benefited him in anyway. Also I think he lies just to lie. So I wouldn't take anything a skid that doesn't like you to heart. She's trying to drive a wedge between you and your husband and she wants to upset you. Looks like she's succeeding. Ask your husband how he really feels and if he doesn't share her view drop it. Stop letting her upset you. She's getting her way by doing it.
"so... they really dont care,
"so... they really dont care, long as daddy is buying things for them
or entertaining them... and they are getting what they want"
Story of my life Steperg