i was right
went to the sporting event and SS15's gf came home with us. DH allowed her to spend the night - they were to sleep in separate bedrooms. I asked DH if he talked with SS15 to clarify the rules of letting ss15's gf spend the night. i got yelled at for how it's not my business how he parents his son and that i need to just relax about it. Fine. I went to bed. SS15 and his gf were in the same bed watching a movie at 11pm. ss15 was to go to bed in his brothers room who wasn't with us this weekend. The sheets to the bed were in the dryer as everything was washed. I got up this morning to find the bed ss15 was to sleep in had no sheets no it and neither ss15 or gf were up yet - both stayed in the same room... I jokingly said that they must not have agreed to the sleeping in separate rooms, DH said nothing. Still nothing has been said to the ss15 about not listening to the rules abotu having gf spend the night. I don't feel it's my place to talk to ss15 and i'm totally pissed with DH for yelling at me for trying to make sure that wouldn't happen. How am i supposed to handle this. am i supposed to be involved with ss lives when it's got nothing to do with how they act or the things they do? beyond fed up with ss15 and total lack of authority he has here but don't feel like it's my place since i've already been told to RELAX. i didnt want kids that's why i dont have my own - am i fooling myself thinking having step kids would be any easier since i didnt have to go through all the initial bullshit? i just want weekends to be DH and I - kids are here way too often adn i need a break from them. i cook, i clean, i do laundry, i do dishes, it seems like theres never any help from ss and DH doesn't enforce anything because he wants teh kids to want to come here.
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Comments
stop doing all that cooking
stop doing all that cooking and cleaning and housework..if parenting SS is none of your business..neither is his laundry, his food, or his clean room/bathroom.
Wow all i have to say is what
Wow all i have to say is what parent allows their 15 year old daughter to stay the night at a guys house? And what parent of a boy accepts. I'd be willing to say you are going to be grandparents soon if this behavior doesn't end
Buttercookie nailed it. This
Buttercookie nailed it. This is disgraceful. Hormones are raging at that age and DH and the young lady's mom are both guilty of poor parenting. At this rate, it's just a matter of time before she gets preggars.
I totally agree with all of
I totally agree with all of you and when DH first mentioned this to me I said no way in hell. There's no need for her to spend the night with us after the event. Her father lives on the way home. DH asked SS15 what his BM has to say about the situation. SS15 said that BM won't say much because it's not her house. DH asked ss15 what the sleepign arrangement would be adn ss15 said he would giveup his room and allow gf to have it and he would sleep in his brothers empty room. that didn't happen.... Before this took place DH and i had a talk about what 15 year olds do and DH said this would give ss15 a chance to prove he can be trusted - how can you prove you're worthy of being trusted when you have the door shut and disobey the initial sleeping arrangement. The GF has a huge chip on her shoulder and reminds me of me when younger. I think it was a huge mistake and wondered if this was an issue of DH yet again not wanting to be the bad guy and wanting to be the cool dad or if I was just blind and this is what kids are doing and I didn't see this due to my irritation with ss15 before this even came about.