There is nothing wrong with what you wanted and I don't think you have to explain.

Most of us 'get it'.

I am glad you deleted it because it was diverted everyone away from helping each other. I plan to delete every troll comment that hits my posts so we don't waiste time on people who aren't even in our situation.
I do hope you get your evening alone with your H. You, we all, deserve it.

I used to be totally against deleting posts from my blogs but I've had a change of heart.

In future I'll delete anything that's from a BM pretending to be SM so she can judge us.

Well, Halloween really is more a kids holiday though, right? Maybe DH and/or SD would be willing to trade Halloween for a different holiday that you would normally have her (NOT Thanksgiving or Christmas probably, but maybe Memorial Day or 4th of July or Labor Day or something? New Year's eve is typically an adult Holiday - maybe that would be a good weekend to trade if you have SD that weekend?)

I do know how you feel though. We had SD12 this year for ALL 3 long summer holiday weekends - Memorial Day, 4th of July and Labor Day and I remember getting flamed right here on this very site for posting something very similar to: "why can't her Mom keep her for at least ONE of the long summer holiday weekends?" We also had SD for a month this summer that was "not planned", which actually was the catalyst for me joining this site and I'm so thankful I did because I learned to at least partially disengage and that allowed me to survive that month! Finally, because BM found it convenient to send SD to visit her mom (SD's GM) on one of the weekends that was H's weekend (there's no CO, so H just goes along with whatever BM and SD want), that messed up the weekend rotation so that we are now scheduled to have SD on all of the rest of the holiday weekends this year, including Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, which were all originally BM's weekends! However, since we do not typically do anything big for those holidays (neither H or I have local family) and BM does, I'm pretty sure that will change again and SD will probably end up spending at least Thanksgiving weekend with BM because at least BM's family will have the big family meal get together. For those reasons, in the past (even BEFORE H & I were married and since), SD has ALWAYS spent those big family holidays with BM and her family. Here's to hoping that continues, although I guess it really doesn't matter anymore since even if SD spent the holidays with us this year I'm pretty sure it would be the first and last time since I don't see H and I still being together in 2011!

Giiiiiirl... No need to apologize, that was not your fault! I only joined a few days ago too, and that made me wonder what the heck i got into! Hopefully from now on people can just be supportive and accept that this site is supposed to be a place to get your feelings out without being judged! I have my SD every other week so I ENJOY my weeks off too! I think all the actual SMs understand that. Heck I'd like a break from my BD too!

"Heck I'd like a break from my BD too!"

Aint that the TRUTH! Lol! That is the ONE positive I focus on when I think about H & I splitting up and how hard it's going to be to be a single parent again is that at least I'll be able to have at least every other weekend "off"! Lol! (Though next I usually think of how much I will miss my kids on those weekends and it doesn't seem like such a "positive" anymore.)

Is there anyway that you and your DH can play hooky on a friday when you don't have your SD therfore making it a little mini staycation for you guys? That way you could still take SD for halloween but still have your alone time with your hubs

I get it! I treasure the weekends that DH and I get alone. They seem very far apart!

In any marriage it is very important that time is taken for just the two of you - DH and I have date night at least every week and if it is a busy month then every other week. Usually in a first time marriage there is a period of time that there are no kids - unless it was a shotgun marriage) so there is that time alone when you marry a man with children that time goes out the window.

How can a family be strong if the two running it don't get time for each other and recharge your batteries. Every couple needs time alone just the two of them and I don't mean at 11PM at night when the whole family is now finally in bed. I would never go more than 2 weeks without having a date with my husband. Our relationship are just too important to me.

The Momster - enjoy your honeymoon - the kids will be okay without you all for 5 days and I guarantee you both will come back better parents and partners for it. You need that time to reconnect and recharge enjoy it!!

I loved my skid free weekends and even my skid free summers - DH had custody of SS and since BM didn't work - he would spend the summer with her. Now I crave the days when I have a bkid free night, afternoon, day or morning! We don't get them often lately because we just had our 2nd in August and she's just now getting over colic but I tried to get a sitter at least every other weekend so DH & I could just go out to dinner and talk without DS who is almost 3 interrupting us.

There is nothing wrong with wanting time alone with your DH and it doesn't matter if that time falls on a holiday or not.

PS I must have missed the original post but from what I can tell - DRAMA!!!

Raggedy, if they come back today and start it up on this one ...please delete immediately.

I can TRY to not rise to their bait but damn, it's hard.

What happened in the other thread that has everyone so worried? I must have missed it.

No need to apologize girl...I can't tell you how many times "I thought" I might get a quiet weekend and then have it all gone with a phone call to DAAAAAAAAAAAAAdy....come pick me up, I'm bored.

Sadly, I read the ENTIRE post last night. It was like a train wreck - I couldn't NOT look!

I told my dh about your post and he said that you are not wrong at all and that the other person was wrong. If it isn;t his weekend there is nothing wrong with telling the bm "this is your time to spend with kid and why don;t you take it"

Dh has done this to bm a lot b/c she did it when she KNEW we had plans and did to ruin them. Now she doesn;t even try b/c she knows dh's answer.

Nothing wrong at all with what you wanted.