Oh Aniki - I can't even follow that!!!  

Happy Friday 

1. What did you expect Steplife to be like?  Like being married... And with a sane ex that cared about the kids and everyone just wanted to work for the betterment of the kid. So naive... LMAO

2. What is the reality of steplife? BM is a Psycho, neglectful, manipulative, abusive monster that only uses kids for her own selfish wants, all while causing as many issues as possible, evven though she admitted to her sister she doesn't even want the kids.

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids.

SD9-mostly sweet, shy, some attitude problems, but nothing too major, generally fairly helpful, but doesn't understand the concept of money or the fact I'm not going to pay her to clean her own room.

SD5- Again, mostly sweet, though since BM decided to pop her ugly mug back in she's started throwing tantrums again. VERY outgoing.

BM - An absolute waste of space. Dresses like a wh0re, uses kids, had a baby to con the bf into marrying her, emotionally abusive to skids, neglectful, slefish narc, that doesn't care about anyone or anything and thinks she's exempt form the rules. Only takes the kids for visitation because come to find out, her mom is sending her money to do such. Then she ditches them, sometimes leaving them home alone. BECAUSE THAT'S SAFE. Also a druggie. Marijuana and most like meth as well. Doesn't care about working for the kids and making things better for them, just cares about what she wants and how she feels and what mommy dearest wants. BLECK.

4. Foods that make the skids cry.  Brocolli, idk what it is... I can get them to eat lots of other stuff, but someone even says the word brocolli and it's like it's the end of the world...

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat. Chips... Like the little bags of chips... They could live off them if I'd let them...

6. Something BM/BD wears that they think is sexy/cool.  Skin tight, WAY too small, short shorts. Basically anything revealing that she can think of, she'll probably try and wear.

7. Skid things you throw away. Slime, slime is the worst invention known to man... Also clay and playdough that leaves the table... 

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid's room.  MAGGOTS. I deep-cleaned that s**8 and DH and I banned EVERYHTHING edible except water from going in there, and water has to be in a bottle with a closed top (except when drinking it.)

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?  Probably some games, also I'm redoing their room, so that will probably be part of christmas somewhere, or I'll save some items until Christmas for that room I'm redoing

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?  The gym. I go whenever possible, it helps keep me sane and in shape at the same time... It's my favorite escape and something I need a lot when I'm stressed out. Lets me work off all the extra energy and stress. Punching bags and sparring too... That's a full of agression breaker.

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

More calm, that I would be an acutal member of the household with real input on day to day life.  That DH would accept help and feedback.  That people would want to do things, as kids, anything was usually fun if it was outside the day to day routine.

2. What is the reality of step life?

Responsibility w/out authority.  That becuase the SDs couldn't wait 10 extra minutes for dinner meant that I'd be left waiting on the side of a deserted road in the dark for 20 mintues because DH had to feed them first because they couldn't wait.  That was a turning point BTW.  That my planning anything didn't matter. That skids weren't part of the household but above it and adults did their bidding.

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

BM is aloof and smart.  And not good with communication.  She's good with money (and knows that DH isn't).  She's also cheap.  She generally doesn't involve me in anything unless necessary but if she does it's not always with a nicety, she assumes that I have more responsibility (including financially) than is required.  That got turned around in the last couple of years very quickly by me.

SDs: SD14 entitled, super smart, manipulative, pretty - but dirty and smelly, refuses to talk with DH (since April).  SD12 the opposite.  SD14 has always resented any authority by anyone while SD12 likes routines and responsibility. SD12 is also pretty, super smart (math is her specialty), and loves exercise and activities - has good local friends.

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

SD14 anything not white, not easy to chew (it hurts her unbrushed mouth to eat "hard food"), and outsider her 'food list' of about 10 things she'll eat.  Most likely to make her cry? Vegetables and fruit.

SD12 cheese and creamy things - she has lactose intolerance so she physically has problems with this.  Otherwise she doesn't like fish or tomatoes, both easy to work around.

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

SD14:  white cheddar mac and cheese.

SD12:  eggs...wait.  this isn't craptastic...hm. She eats pretty good really.  I'd maybe consider her speciality of frying up kielbasa for so long it is burned - she loves it burned. DH and I have to turn off the heat when she's cooking and make her stop.

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

UNK

7. Skid things you throw away.

SD14:  clothes, dishes, glasses, shoes, books, pens/pencils, lunch totes, makeup, hairbrushes, sheets, towels...anything she leaves out in common areas after 24 hrs and anything rotting in her room.

SD12: usually just moldy/rotting art or science projects she doesn't understand will rot/mold.  I did remove her birthday gift cert/card once she left out and clearly wasn't happy with it and her elementary school yearbook (put into the general bookshelf).  I did throw her trash can down the walkway of the house years ago after she walked by it 10 times in a rare bout of pique about having to put it away after I emptied it.

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

SD14 - never thought I'd find used sanitary pads but I did.  Not sure why I was surprised.

SD12 - a hidden stash of craptastic candy given to her by her troubesome friend.  I suspect it was for when troublesome friend when she came over b/c SD12 isn't a huge candy eater.

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

I always get them one nice thing (like clothing or something for their room), a set of PJs, and a gift certificate.  That's it. SD14 so far will get nothing from me this year.

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

I go out with friends, I go visit a friend in a neighboring town, I have a monthly facial, do my yoga.

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

I really didn't have any expectations since this wasn't my first rodeo. 

2. What is the reality of step life?

So freaking expensive with lawyers. I am over the drama with BM and just want DH- who is a good dad to be allowed to be as dad. 

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

BM1- Druggie who I have never had the pleasure of meeting in person. The one time I was supposed to she was in jail instead of at her son's high school graduation.

BM2- Seems decent on the surface but evil to her core.

SS18- has his issues but really tries and is overall a good kid who tried to make me and dh happy and proud of him

SS13- good kid but messed up by BM to the point he is afraid to speak for himself

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

SS18-Asparagus! It is the funniest thing and we all love it, so it still happens. 

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

Soda.. so much soda. I was able to get them to switch to sparkling flavored water and they actually like it. 

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

A full wedding set even though she isn't married. I am talking big engagement ring, wedding band and at least 2 anniversary bands. 

7. Skid things you throw away.

Clothes from SS18 that I can't get smells out of... I don't know what it is with that kid. lol

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

Food and it pisses me off because we have strict rules on that.

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

We are doing a big vacation for all the kids, I think. Whether SS13 is going to be able to go or not will remain to be seen. We will get trip insurance for him.

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

I drink.

Going to give this a go :

What did you expect step life to be like?

I was totally disillusioned; I really believed we were going to be a happy family, just before our wedding I told the skids that I promised to them that I would be the very best step father that I could be. 

What is the reality of step life?

I really had big ideas about how great everything would be, I have never been so wrong about something, some of the scars will never fade.

Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

I love my DW to the moon and back but she is an enabler to her kids, although she has done better in recent months she still has a way to go.  Skids are disrespectful, disregarding, unappreciative, disgusting, lazy parasites.

Foods that make the skids cry.

Anything they would have to pay for themselves or clean up afterwards.

Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

McDonalds, blech!!!!

Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

Don’t know.

Skid things you throw away.

Anything left out in common areas when DW isn’t looking, drug paraphernalia, mail, anything I can.

Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

Used to be drugs and drug paraphernalia, now that’s expected, unexpected I guess would be the floor, a clean bed, college application, but haven’t found those things yet.

What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

Not a GD thing !!!!!!

How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

Sometimes go to the movies or a concert by myself, but that hasn’t happened in a long time.

1. Since skids were well into adulthood and ss30 had kids of his own I thought it would be a piece of cake, we'd all be friends and have a great time with each other and DH.

2. The reality was ss's did not want DH to remarry, they have been jealous and rude our entire marriage. One ss30 had been alright but ss33 has been outright hostile.  I went from Jane Nobody to Evil Money Grubbing SM overnight once we were married.  

7. I threw away a box of ss33's drug paraphenalia he had stored in our basement. No way was I taking the fall for ss's habits.

8. Found a shoe box full of dried up used condoms when cleaning out ss's old room.  Talk about grossed out to the max!  

10. I go to the gym, a friends, or extend a shopping trip whenever I know they are coming over. I can also cordon myself in the other side of the house, lock the door and feign taking a nap.  

Here goes:

1. What did you expect step life to be like? Never expected it, happened fast!

2. What is the reality of step life? Wonderful, painful, and outcomes unknown. Dealing with the victims of BM: SS and DH

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids: BM is a smart, short, dumpy-looking sea-hag whose never-great looks reveal her lazy, junk-food lifestyle. She's also a narcissistic abuser who is likely bi-polar AND borderline personality disorder, a total turn-on-a-dime rager who lies and uses sex to get what she wants (she's paid rent via BJ's, for example) who I force myself go pray for because it is hard to summon an ounce of respect for her beyond being a human creature. That said, she's pretty inhuman, and idealizes vampires, werewolves, etc. 

4. Foods that make the skids cry. None

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat. Amazingly, I have no idea what SS eats these days, but guess it's fast food.

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool. She wears mens clothing & thinks it's cute like Annie Pott's character in Pretty in Pink (80's!), but it's really like homeless thrift store ensembles for a play BM isn't in.

7. Skid things you throw away. nothing.

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room. A box of raisins in a desk drawer that had rotted/liquified. So I guess there is one thing I threw away. I left his sex toy in the drawer where I found it, clearly from BM because she sells those and the lube was that same brand. Unsurprisingly I'v also found empty baggies from pot, resin, bent bobby pins used to scrape the pipe out, a jar of weed, lighters, Visine, gum, incense...

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas? Will SS18 still live with us then?!

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!? I come to ST to vent, then do stuff like play with the dog, love on my cats, call friends, read, and occssionally, get a pedicure.

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

BM and DH equally share physical and financial custody of their children. 50/50 for everything. They both created/adopted them, so they both equally take responsibility of everything given they live in the same county and have the same overall earning potential. Skids that are smart and hard-working (yeah, don't know why I thought this would be true).

2. What is the reality of step life?

BM is reliving the teenage years and 20's that she didn't have, because she chose to have a high school sweetheart and kids when she was young. Therefore, she is a crappy mother who doesn't provide her kids with a stable home life, isn't around, and contantly talks about moving to other states and countries (without the skids, of course).

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

BM - A financial wreck, mentally unstable, doesn't understand boundaries, and reliving some sort of youth, which she's felt the need to share her inapropriate adventures when her teenage daughter (needless to say, their relationship is not great now). DH doesn't recognize BM when he sees her - she's dyed her hair blond, has a nose ring, and tattoos - she's physically very different from when they were married.

SD18 - Growing up to be an upstanding young lady. She's still lazy and clingy when she's at home, but she definitely makes a good impression to her peers and teachers. Like a lot of millenials her age, she expects us (me and DH) to know more than she does, so instead of doing her own research, she'll expect us to tell her the answer or do it for her. 

SS14 - Too many issues. Suicidal, attention-deficit, extremely emotional, or devoid of emotion, bi-polar (this one is my diagnosis, not from an actual professional). Just plain odd and gross, but he manages to have lots of friends to hand out with, though he tends to lose friends too. Bain of my existence.

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

SD18 - Anything stir fried together. She can't have different foods touch. I used to make fun of her a lot...then BS came along and he doesn't eat foods that touch. I think it's genetic from DH's side.

SS14 - Everything I cook. Like, specifically, he cried at a gas station two weeks ago when I made everyone egg, ham, and cheese breakfast sandwiches for a road trip. Apparently he despises eggs.

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

Pizza, cake, cookies...the usual.

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

I wouldn't know, I have little to no interaction. Maybe her nose ring.

7. Skid things you throw away.

Ummm...used tissues left on end tables. Yuck!

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

About 50 to a hundred empty bags of chips in SS14's closet. Unexpected, but not all surprising.

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

DH handles it.

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

Go to my room or go on walks.

What did you expect step life to be like?

i had horrible ex step life so I expected this one to be better. It is 

2. What is the reality of step life?

SDs are adults and aren’t in my face 24/7. And mynDH puts me first. So that’s good 

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

BM is nuts. Never worked. Lives off alimony and welfare. YSD is nice. OSD is a felon and works as a stripper 

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

Lol anything healthy and fruits/veggies 

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

junk. They are both thin. Don’t know how. They eat junk all day 

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

facial tatoo. Oh you meant what BM wears. OSD is the one with facial tattoos. BM thinks that’ the best clothes is what people donate to her. When they were married she took pride in only wearing second hand and never allowed DH to buy new clothes. And he was the only one working. 

7. Skid things you throw away.

they just visit dint live here 

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

n/a

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

purse for YSD. Nothing for OSD. She doesn’t speak to us at the moment. We don’t have our “priorities straight”. It should be her. Instead we dare to care about other things like job and each other and YSD. How dare we

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

i am lucky to not have SDs living with me 

And still haved nightmares

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

Not sure.  Never expected to be with a guy with kids.

2. What is the reality of step life?

HELL on earth

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

Jealous, narcissistic HCGUBM and spoiled, coddled brats

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

Anything wholesome or home cooked

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

Chicken nuggets, cheese pizza

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

Mumu?

7. Skid things you throw away.

Their craptacular "gifts"

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

A book would be unexpected--never found one

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

Stopped buying skids anything after they conspired with the BM to make a phoney CPS report. ('07)

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

Gardening, wine, house cleaning

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

-An every other weekend gig 

2. What is the reality of step life? HELL 

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

-Narcissist and Golden Child 

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

-Anything his dad brings me and not him 

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

-taquitos, shit from the vending machines 

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

-converse, Victoria’s Secret PINK brand 

7. Skid things you throw away.

-Legos 

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

-pass (nothing) 

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

-outdoor play set, clothes, cheap toys 

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

-social media, grocery shopping, running 

1. What did you expect step life to be like?

Part-Time and less responsibility of taking care of two kids i didnt create.

2. What is the reality of step life?

Annoyance,Frustrations,losing your shit and sometimes resentment. 

3. Describe BM (or BD) and the skids

Mom is a lazy fat ass who lived off child support,welfare and used ALL her daughters social security to pay rent instead of her using it for therapies she needed. ALl because she didnt want to get a job. That mental peice of shit then abandoned the kids SHE wanted. all because she wants to make finding a girlfriend a priority. she likes to go drinking and act like shes in her young 20s while she is in her mid 30s. oh did i mention, shes a thief who stole $2000 from her daughters social security money after we gotten custody of her. 

Stepkids are alot of work and require too much more attention than i expected to deal with

4. Foods that make the skids cry.

none. they eat everydamn thing. oldest one even asks to eat what im eating.

5. Crappy foods the skids ALWAYS want to eat.

youngest eats good. but the oldest asks for anything anyone else is eating. or junk snacks. no one can enjoy their food in peace without her begging for someones own food.

6. Something BM/BD wear that she/he considers sexy/cool.

Her heffer self trying to look attractive in jordans, snapback caps, graphic ghetto tshirts. 

7. Skid things you throw away.

anything on the floor ive asked them to pickup and take to their room

8. Unexpected things you found in the skid’s room.

nothing i wouldnt expect from a typical kid

9. What are you buying the skids for Christmas?

not much right now. we are renovating a house. so its either money for a house to get their own room. or get gifts and wait another year to move.

10. How do you temporarily escape Step He!!?

i leave to my moms or go shopping or visit my neice.