My husband and I have been married just over a year. He has 2 children, ages 17 and 16, who he had not seen for 12 years.

In August, we received a call from the SD via facebook, and she talked to her dad for the first time in those 12 years. She said that her step father had been sexually abusing her for years, had raped her, and that her mom has been mentally and physically abusing her as well. She also told us that a man had also kidnapped her and her friend 3 years ago, held them both at gun point, and raped both of them, and was currently in prison

We immediately got into our vehicle, and drove 100 miles to take her to the PD to file a report. We left the PD with her, and brought her to our hometown, where her mother agreed to allow her to stay with my husbands sister. After 8 days of that, my DH sister called, freaking out, that my SD had been having phone sex with her boyfriend all night, in the prescence of her daughter, and wanted her out of the house immediately. I defended by SD, and told the cops that my SIL had overreacted, had no proof of this, and we have not spoken to her since. My SD was allowed to come stay in our home from that point on. About 1 month after all this started, the detective came to speak with my SD to get her statement about her allegations against her step father, and I was present at the meeting. My SD made some serious allegations that involoved pentration by her step-dad, both vaginally and orally, and a lot of other things. I stood by her, and defended her, consoled her, and told her I'd be there every step of the way.

As time went on, the investigation failed to provide any evidence of my SD's accusations. They interviewed several people who my SD claimed to have knowledge of the abuse, but no one could confirm her allegations, and social services states that since they could not prove the allegations, that their case would most likely be closing soon. We had already scheduled my SD for counseling, and the appt had not yet arrived, and in a panic and to keep her safe, we took her to our local safe shelter to file a protection order to prevent bio mom or step-dad from having contact with her. My DH took her, and while there, he called me and asked me to come over, which I did. During the interview that the safe shelter conducted for the protection order, my SD's story was not consistent with what she had told the detective. Pretty inconsistent, in fact, and details that would not likely to be skewed, for example, she told the safe shelter woman that he had not penetrated her, that he had masturbated on her, and that he had dangled his penis and balls in her face, but not forced himself into her mouth as she had told the detective, and that the instances of where this happened was not the same either. Red flags went up for us both, and so I made some phone calls to the county in which the supposed rape by gun point occurred and spoke with the states attorney who informed me that, no, my SD had not been raped, or held at gun point, and that yes, he was in prison for having sexual contact with her friend, but that he never touched my SD.

At this point, we didn't know what to do. The social worker and detective were talking about charging my SD with false allegations, and that placement might be an option for her. Still holding out hope, we waited until after the appointment with the counselor. At the appointment, we talked with the psychiatric provider, and after reviewing my SD's records, which we had no access to, she clearly states to us "you are in danger with her in your home. She has accused several people of sexual assault, none of which has been proven, including her younger brother's friend, and she has a violent past. She has a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, conduct disorder, and ADHD, and if the state is recommending placement, I suggest you do it." And so we did. For a month. And then we agreed to bring her back into our home.

It was going well, until last week. Without us knowing, she began having regular contact with her mother, and suddenly, she said she wanted to go back to her mom's. With the court order in place for her to be in our care, we didn't know what the options were, so we told her we would check into it. Then suddenly, I became her target. She told my DH's family that I'm mean to her, that I've said mean things, and that she's not comfortable being around me, and that's why she wants to go home. She has since been placed back with her mother, because quite honestly, we are scared to have her in our home, and I have NEVER mistreated her or said a mean thing to her. I've done nothing but bend over backwards for this girl, just to be stabbed in the back, and if she didn't get her way, we were afraid she would take the allegations to the next step.

Since then, my DH's family has been texting him, telling him that his "f**king wife" shouldn't have interferred, why would he let me control everything, and that his daughter should've been first, on and on. I'm devastated. I did nothing wrong to this girl, but all she had to say was that I was horrible to her, and suddenly they all believe it. I don't get it, and neither does my husband, who has been defending me with all that he has. It doesn't make sense to me how they can't see it?? I was never even alone with her in all the time she was with us and neither was my husband for this reason! And if her bio mom and step dad were SO horrible, why would she go back? Even on my worst day, I couldn't have been nearly as terrible as they were on their best day! But somehow, I'm the worst.

I love my husband, with all of my heart, and we are so good for each other, but I can't live with his family treating me like this,and it's not fair to him to be in the middle, but I'm not sure I can forgive them for this. We live in a small town and everyone is hearing about how bad I am not to mention my own children's father. I don't know what to do. My SD obviously has some serious mental health issues and I tried desperately to get her help, but in the end, I lost, she won, and I'm paying the consequences.

Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks for listening.