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I am literally LOLing

nengooseus's picture

DH and BM are involved in (another) custody dispute.  Today was a "settlement conference" with both lawyers and the GAL.  Apparently, our attorney took the opportunity to chastize both DH and BM for being a$$holes and her observation was that after reading through the correspondence, it looks like *I'm* the only one with the kids' best interests in mind.

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nengooseus's picture

I am clearly slipping.

But I'm taking this as validation that I'm the best parent.  And I think DD13 needs to be briefed on that fact.

Letti.R's picture

Must be hard on you being the only adult having to oversee skids and "adult" kids too...

(Glad someone else can see your worth too.)

nengooseus's picture

Bless his heart, DH gets it.  The biggest piece of the problem is that BM is completely intransigent, which makes DH behave that way, too.  If there were EVER any give and take, this would be a very different circumstance.

tog redux's picture

Picking your battles can help a lot with a BM like this - not everything needs to be fought to the end. 

nengooseus's picture

Unless he agrees to anything she wants, without question, he is ignored and she maintains control, which is her #1 priority, regardless of what's best for the kids.  There's no consultation, there can be no requests.  There is ZERO flexibility, respect or kindness.  That's mighty hard to deal with.

tog redux's picture

I totally get that, BM here was the same way. Still have to pick your battles. Not all of those things are worth fighting over, you just have to figure out which ones. 

My DH reacted to BM being this way by fighting her tooth and nail. It didn't work, BM still got everything by manipulating SS and the court.  We spent scads of money for nothing. 

Simpleton21's picture

LOL, I bet BM and DH loved hearing that!  I'm glad it came from your attorney!  I've finally got my DH to stop reacting to BM but tog is right....it only takes 1 high conflict parent to drive this BS.  I wish someone like an atty or therapist would utter those same words to the BM we deal with.  She needs to hear it!