SD24 just texted me...

She "would've called but I know you're working right now". What about?

First text: Aniki are you free this Saturday to go shopping with me for my wedding dress??

Second: My maid of honor is coming too. Oh I hope you can go!!

Third: Please please call me when your done working!

THIS is interesting. I know she and BioHo have not been getting along for several months now. Yes to the Dress (shopping)?

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Oh boy. "Barren Bitch stole

Oh boy. "Barren Bitch stole MY job as mother of the bride!"

Yeeeeeesssssss!!! Sounds like

Yeeeeeesssssss!!! Sounds like the title of a drama episode!

Tricky

But it sure feels like it will fire up Bio Ho. Can you make a polite excuse to not go?

Oh, I'm quite certain it will fire up BioHo. Especially since DH told me that 'Ho has refused to do anything to help SD with her wedding because she doesn't like the groom. SD just called to ask DH if he has any pics of her from childhood because 'Ho won't let SD have any. Unfortunately, 'Ho has every photo.

I could make an excuse, but I would honestly like to help SD. So it's a pickle...

In that case...

If you genuinely want to help SD then I would go and just deal with BioHo as it happens

BioHo can suck rocks. *diablo

BioHo can suck rocks. *diablo*

I would go. UNLESS she has

I would go. UNLESS she has been awfully rotten to you Aniki.

She made the effort to call you personally.

What do YOU think.

Thumper, I am leaning towards

Thumper, I am leaning towards going. Our relationship has greatly improved since the Christmas 2019 apology.

Aniki

You are a lucky gal your SD values you. Its refreshing because usually on here you read how the SM is excluded. If it fires up BioHo great name BTW, all the better. But I am evil that way.

Stepdrama, believe me, it's a

Stepdrama, believe me, it's a YUGE change from a few years ago!

Evil Aniki is feeling a bit smug... Oy. *scratch_one-s_head*

Yes to the Dress!! Go so I

Yes to the Dress!! Go so I can live vicariously thru you.

SS22 GF and I are always talking wedding dresses. Not that they are planning anything at all until 30ish, but she does not get along with DBDB and tells me I need to be there when she is dress shopping.

Classy, you made me LOL!

'Ho's style is skintight and UN-classy. You should see some of SD's old prom pics. *shok*

I would do it...

but you know me, over functioning and concilatory.

But, if it were Feral Forger who made efforts and apologies and was nice to me since 2019...I would go, with reservations (and a light wallet...)

We're going on 15 months of a

We're going on 15 months of a 180-positive-behavior change, which has been lovely. You know me - Constant Vigilance! While I would welcome the day when I can let down my guard and completely relax around the skids/grandskids, I'm not there.

Psssst.... my wallet will be damn near buoyant!

I would go, if your

I would go, if your relationship is good and improved, no reason you can't go and enjoy the moment with her.

It is, bananaseedo. For over

It is, bananaseedo. For over a year now.

As an SD, as well as SM, I

As an SD, as well as SM, I say go. SD is likely already feeling pretty down about 'Ho being...well, 'Ho. Not that I think you should give up your good mental health to go, but if you can spare it, it will likely be good for you both.

BUT, find out if 'Ho is going. If she is, graciously bow out but offer to do something else with SD (pick out her shoes, or jewelry, or flowers, etc).

And you know 'Ho will blow a gasket, but your Hot Hubby will put out her flames right quick. Honestly, I'd find 'Ho being mad a compliment at this point. It means you're doing something right.

I always value your input, Lt

I always value your input, Lt. Dad!

DH told me that 'Ho is holding SD's childhood pictures hostage (that %$*#@)!) because she doesn't like SD's future husband. My mother didn't like my psycho exh, but it did not stop her (or my Dad) from trying to give me the wedding of my dreams.

If 'Ho is going, I will NOT go and tell SD that it's something she and her mother should do together, not my place, etc... I'll have words prepared just in case.

Yes, 'Ho will blow a major gasket. As far as 'Ho is concerned, every step I take is a step in the wrong direction. AKA, Barren Bitch Stealing My Family. While I am most certainly NOT trying to step on 'Ho's toes, it is not my fault her relationships with her children are fast deteriorating. Maybe it's a matter of stable vs unstable...

Hot Hubby and flames... Yes, I find him sooooooooo hot! He'll stomp out her flames in a flash. Should I have him stand guard outside the ladies' restroom at the wedding/reception? LOL

Hi Aniki...

GO! And most importantly...enjoy the day with your stepdaughter.

Regardless what you do or don't do that nasty arse woman is going to be mad...forever. Have fun and make it a great day

I'm going, SteppedOff!

You're right; she is. 'Ho is the source of the negativity in her life, but refuses to see/believe it.

Of course you should go and

Of course you should go and enjoy every minute. Your BM should not even be a consideration in your decision. Screw her. I think your SD wanting you to attend this event, and yes shopping for a wedding gown is an event, is something special. So go and say yes to SD and the dress.

Queen, I think 'Ho has been

Queen, I think 'Ho has been screwed more than enough! Screwed over... karma has had her on the back burner for for too long.

I am going and saying yes to SD and the dress. xo

Go

I went with SD59 to shop for the wedding dress for her first wedding. As a matter of fact, I did all the wedding planning. I can't remember where BM was or why she was MIA but that's the way it was. SD needed a mom figure and it was me. BM did show up for the shower and wedding. SD seemed to appreciate my efforts in retrospect, I heard her say one time, " BM couldnt even go with me to pick out a wedding dress".

The next wedding, SD and BM were back together so BM was involved in the planning and I could just attend as a guest. Crazy steplife....

I'm going, JRI.

In my mind, I have always assumed that - at some point - there will be skid reconciliations with 'Ho. DH does not think this will happen with the SSs, but we all know how powerful the lure of these toxic twunts is. Don't understand it, but it does happen. For that reason, I will never completely let down my guard.

Reconciliations

For sure, there will be reconciliations. Our BM was MIA for years, neglectful, volatile, awful. She straightened out somewhat in her later years. She and Clueless hosted lavish holiday events and she babysat. In between, she had blowups with everyone, like usual. Flash forward to her final days and all 3 kids, spouses and grandkids were at the hospital nonstop until she died. Now her memory is revered with oldest SGD breaking down each year on the anniversary of her death and SD59 lamenting that she cant call at all hours to discuss Animal Planet.

That's why I will never be

That's why I will never be able to completely relax and will continue to hold back.

My parents grew up with "They're family so you have to forgive them." I can forgive people, but no longer allow them a place in my life. That includes toxic family members (and I grey rock them). But that toxic narc siren song is strong.

Ahh dress shopping. That was

Ahh dress shopping. That was the demise of everything with BM. Granted it was for SDs 5th grade father/daughter dance (that BM never bought a dress for previously and she didn't have a problem with the year prior of me buying her a dress and stil brings up 3 years later) but, lead to the fall out.

I can so see BM being like Ho in future. On that note... I would go!

She clearly wants you there just for asking. I would enjoy the day and know that YOU helped her. Especially if things haven't been good with BM and your relationship has improved.

Things have NOT been good

Things have NOT been good with the skids and BioHo. Their fallouts with her continue. Why that woman refuses to see the damage she is causing is beyond me. 'Ho can wildly accuse me all she wants of "stealing" her family, but she is the one driving them away. It's very sad

Our relationship HAS improved and I will go.

If you want to go dress shopping with her

then GO! If you don't want to go then make up a polite excuse not to. Don't let what BM's reaction might be make you not go if you really want to help SD find a wedding dress. Decide based on what you want

I'm going! I spoke with SD

I'm going! I spoke with SD last night and it will be SD, her MoH, and me. No 'Ho.

Interesting... nice to see

Interesting... nice to see maturity in SD!

Let us know how it goes! I hope it's drama free.

Isn't it just, DPW?

Fingers crossed for no drama!

I think it's pretty special

I think it's pretty special that she is asking you to do this, and if it pisses HO off that's just a side benefit now isn't it.

I think so, too, advice.

I think so, too, advice. Although I honestly couldn't care less if 'Ho is pissed. She has brought this on herself with her craptasticity (is that a word? LOL), which has slowly but surely pushed away 4 out of 5 of her skids. 'Ho seems to believe we're in a competition, which is sooooooooo not true. She has nothing I want. N O T H I N G. She had the man and royally FUBAR'd that. Thankfully! He's MY man now so I have everything I want.

Sooo...who is paying for the

Sooo...who is paying for the dress? Are you going to be expected to contribute towards it if you go shopping? Do you want to help pay for it?

SD is paying for her dress.

SD is paying for her dress. She simply wants my help/opinion in picking out the best/right dress. I am willing to pay for an accessory (as long as it is not $$$), but did not tell SD that.

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