Eff Off to the Canadian wildfire smoke that is making the mid-Atlantic look like a scene from Soylent Green or 1975 air pollution - you pick. LOL

Might try my hand at Paella this weekend. I took a cooking class in Barcelona Spain last September. I brought home the rice, paprika and saffron from Spain. I have the pan and made a batch of sofrito, but I'm (for some reason) lacking the confidence to make it. Insert chicken noises.

the last 2yrs with.

•  Eff0ff to ... pick something. I am decidedly and somewhat surprisingly not overly irritated by much this week.  DW says I look years younger now that the shit show of a totally reactive business model and Sr. management team is in my past.
• Wait, Eff0ff to a blown out shoe. The stitching on the side of a pair of loafers gave up the ghost.  Fortunately, the shoe repair place near our home can repair it for a fraction of what replacing the shoes would cost.
• And... Eff0ff to idiots who stick their hand in a hot springs in Yellowstone NP in spite of warning signs everywhere advising otherwise. We are doomed.  Idiots abound.

F0rn: 

• I made low carb shrimp Tom Yam with cauli rice this week. Pretty good stuff.
• Salads, lots of them the past two weeks.
• Not sure what we will do for the Holiday, or what I will make for for outdoor feasting. Iwas going to work and give my management team the day off. So, nothing is planned.  Though I am thining we will leave for either Zion NP or Joshua Tree in the AM after we do out weekly IP weigh in.  
• 

Eff to the heat. It's awful hot and we need rain. Worried what the water bill be trying to keep our garden alive. Would sure like some rain. We need it bad.

I love deviled eggs for anything outside!!

Eff off to this week and to the entire month of June. It's been the busiest June at work I can remember in a long time, and it's like I do something for 15 minutes and go back to my email and there's 10 new messages. AGH.  I am tired. I need a vacation. I cannot wait until next week when Monday will be slow and I'll log off early, no work on the 4th - staying off every computer all day. Two long weekends coming up as well in lieu of a "real" vacation.

Off off to DH. We have friends coming over tomorrow late morning and he still hasn't mowed the lawn like he was going to over a week ago. His stuff is all over and the downstairs guest bath is a mess. I need to remind him to clean it all NOW because I don't get home till 6 and need to make bread for dinner tomorrow. And I'll have to mow in the morning if it's not done b/c I need to set up the table outside. EFF!  Boo hoo if he says he's tired. Try MY job DH and then come home and do what I do - THEN you will know what tired is.

Picnics for me involve cold wine, soft goat cheese, a good other cheese, good crackers, grapes. And mayyyyybe some hummus and carrots. Keep it simple.

1. Eff off to SD17 Powersulk. Shes at her mothers so we probs wont hear from her for a while. With the holiday coming, I smell some kind of something. And Im certain I wont hear anything on my bday a few days after 4th.

2. Eff off to The cold. I know we are super lucky its not as hot as other places but the cold windy gloom weve had the past 3 plus months is really bringing my mood and energy down.

3. Eff of to to vacation until after July 4th. Because I work in agriculture, things are screaming busy until after July. But I did take my bday off on Thursday and am busily making plans for fun hi jinx this weekend.

4. Eff off to getting older.

Summer food = guacamole and chips, margaritas.

And anywhere we end up its bbq all the way baybay!

Mmmmm, cold fried chicken is a favorite. Haven't had it in ages, mostly because I don't make fried chicken and when I do I'm not waiting around to eat it. But my Mom's was a picnic favorite.

Eff off to ... whiners. Can you do anything about it? No? Can anybody do anything about it? No? Then go find something productive to do.

Eff off to the heat. And stupid people. Also bad drivers. 

My favorite sandwich lately has been whole wheat pita, roasted garlic hummus, klamata olives, thinly sliced red oinions, roasted red peppers and a big handful of arugala. Add some carrot sticks and cherries. Delicious.

Eff off to insurance companies not covering weight loss drugs and care  So much of it is rooted in the idea that being overweight is a choice.. a moral failing..

Obesity is one of the only medical conditions where it appears that they want to apply personal responsibility (despite that the reason for being overweight may not be totally controllable).  do they refuse to treat lung cancer in a smoker? do they refuse to admit a liver patient because they drink (I will carve out that they won't give you new body parts if you won't stop..)?  Do they refuse to treat a suicide victim? Do they turn you away and not cover your claim if you were drunk and got in an accident?  Do they deny your medical bills when you just do something incredibly stupid.. like decide to try out your kid's skateboard? NO.. they treat and cover all sorts of conditions that could be prevented.. even blood pressure and cholesterol mmeds are coverd.. and certainly better health and food choices could make those unnecessary.. even some diabetes would be improved with better diet.. but they cover THOSE health issues.. and related meds.

Yes.. to an extent, it's calories in vs calories out.. but not everyone will burn calories at the same rate.. natural metabolism DOES factor into this.. 

And.. yes.. many people are overweight because they lack good eating habits.. they don't exercise.. but the motivation behind those things may include a complicated mix of lifestyle (including work hours.. commutes.. caring for kids etc).. genetics,.. and sure.. a bit of willpower thrown in with medical issues. as well coming into play.

I know people can and do lose weight.. but 90 percent of people who lose weight regain it.. often and more.  That means that conventional dieting and exercise programs are likely unsustainable for the vast majority of people who try them.

I mean.. count me in that mix.  I lost about 75 lbs 8 years ago.. kept it off for a couple of years.. but with menopause.. and lifestyle issues.. it has come back.  When I was "on program".. I was eating in the neighborhood of under 1500 calories a day.  I was spending 100's a month on nutritional shakes and supplements.  I was spending approximately 2 -3 hours a day being intentionally active.. working out.. walking the dog.. walking at lunch at work.   

Right now, I commute 4 hours a day 3 days a week to a 10 hour workday add in a couple hours for bare minimum hygiene and eating.  That is already 16 hours spoken for.  then.. any normal person needs at least an hour to decompress.. where is the time for meal prep? where is that 2-3 hours I used to work out? I'm already doomed to getting 7 or fewer hours of sleep a night.  The balance of the week isn't much easier as I am having to fit in and chores or house cleaning.. errands.. the grocery store etc.. I try to be a bit active doing stuff on the weekend.. but 2 days a week isn't really going to help much.. and with such limited time.. I am sometimes cornered iinto eating from the cafeteria.. or quick food that is more processed.. 

I mean.. spending hours meal prepping.. it's hard.. you want to spend time with family right?  And.. we don't even watch TV.. it's not like I'm glued to the tube.. I just don't have time. (about every other week we go see my elderly father on one day off.. that is a full day shot since he is about 4 hours from us).. 

The stress of being sleep deprived.. dealing with life.. etc.. i sure don't always make the best choices in food.. but I do try.. but with so much time required to be sitting.. it's a losing battle.. esp with a metabolism that seems wrecked.  I know my job and schedule is killing me.. I just feel like I don't have much choice.

I wish I had access to try one of the new meds.. maybe I would be able to not stress eat.. maybe losing a bit of weight would help push me to be a bit more active too.. and keep me going in a more positive direction? 

It's just really difficult to deal with food because it's a substance you cannot live without.. you can quite smoking.. drinking..drugs.. but you can't quit eating.

forn is that we have some nice crabs in our crab pots.. so I will be picking steamed crab this weekend!

We have had an eventful month,:

1.  My "cold' turned out to be bacterial bronchitis.

2.  The bacterial bronchitis led to terrible coughing attacks.

3.  The coughing attacks led to severe back pain.

4.  ER determined that the back issue wasn't a torn muscle as I thought, but a vertebral collapse fracture.  I have osteopenia, early osteoporosis.

5.  2 weeks ago, DH85 fell in our kitchen and couldn't get up.  With my back, I couldn't help him up.  He was finally to scoot to some steps and get up with a cane.  We think it's a bruised rib, he still can't sleep all night in bed.

6.  The next day, our basement sewer backed up with poo and tp all over.

7.  Today, my Mom100 suffered chest pains and went to the ER.  They don't think it's a heart attack but aren't sure what it is.  I'm reluctant to put her thru many invasive tests.

So, I'm about ready for this month to be over.

I'm so late because work is so annoying.

I'm running multi projects.  For one of them I've asked the team that wants the output of the project to supply me with a project manager for weeks.  Still don't have them so I'm having to step into make things happen.  Had a meeting with them this am.  Still no project manager.  They say they will have someone by Wednesday but once I find out who this person is I'll have to train them to the way we run these particular projects.  What I do is not BAU and has to be handled with kid gloves.  And the PM has to be able to everthing from setting up meetings to managing senior management and external relationships.  Most of the men in the frame don't like having to do the admin part of the role and I can't say I'm looking forward to having to have a come to jesus meeting with whoever it is.

F0rn

Potato salad with a vinigrette.  I'll toss in scallions, radishes, carrots, etc 

Spanish omelette served with crunchy white bread

And lots of chilled wine