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O/T - I want to talk about SEX

noidea1010's picture

Submitted by noidea1010 on Wed, 10/02/2013 - 9:21pm

Another blog earlier today got me thinking and I apologize if this is TMI, however, I'm interested if some of you ladies can relate.

SO and I have sex about 1-3 times a week, more if I'm particularly happy with him and he doesn't have SD12. (Like the author of Stepmonster, he doesn't have a bedroom door. Very disturbing.) I think this amount is fine, he would prefer more and gets his feelings hurt when I don't.

Do you think your "friskiness" is linked to how good of a Dad SO\DH is? Earlier on the Happy Hump Day blog, I was racking my brain for something to post, because I think I can be too negative, so I thought it was a great idea! I realized that a lot of the women posting and boasting (yes, I'm a bit jealous) about having a great DH and great sex life.

Yet, I find myself frequently turned off by SO allowing SD12 to use excuses, providing them for her himself, using them himself in terms of BM or divorce, and anything insecurity wise. Insecurity issues, especially ones that get taken out on me, are a HUGE turnoff.

Would love to know others thoughts, comments, theories. Especially the good ones, because I love a good romance story. Wink

Comments

MamaDuck's picture

Submitted by MamaDuck on Wed, 10/02/2013 - 9:32pm

I'll start by saying SO and I are both horn dogs really, there have only been a few times where I didn't want to have sex with him.

ALL 3 of those times were to do with a BM issue. He accused me of using the refusal of sex as punishment, after thinking about it for a second, I said "nope, not really a punishment, right now I'm not attracted to a you because you let another woman walk around with balls, maybe if you go retrieve your balls, we can use them!"

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Thu, 10/03/2013 - 6:52am

I got nothin on this one ladies. But the thread did make me laugh. Since my bride is currently halfway around the world from me and won't be here for another month there is truly no sex life to discuss. Since she is staying at my mom and dad's house there is not even any phone sex to stay connected with.

Sigh. Sad

Elizabeth's picture

Submitted by Elizabeth on Thu, 10/03/2013 - 8:10am

I am totally guilty of "withholding sex" if you want to look at it that way. However, I am not deliberately doing it to punish him (usually). I find the lying and deceit and his overt babying of a grown person a MAJOR turnoff.

noidea1010's picture

Submitted by noidea1010 on Thu, 10/03/2013 - 9:33am

Hell no, I don't live there. No way I could without a door. I don't even like staying there when SD is there, because of it. I've even strongly encouraged him to get a door. He's got no excuse, there a door frame, not like a lot would go into getting that fixed.

Also, I should say that I don't purposely withhold sex, it's just a major turnoff with all the drama.

HungryEyes's picture

Submitted by HungryEyes on Thu, 10/03/2013 - 9:51am

Nah Fiance is really good about putting our relationship first...maybe that's why we are going at it twice a day.

Sometimes though, when we spend 45 minutes trying to decide on something from Netflix and neither of us like the same type of movie or documentary, I wonder if we have anything more than sex going for us.

MoominMama's picture

Submitted by MoominMama on Mon, 09/10/2018 - 4:18am

I hardly ever feel like it when ss is in the house. If he actually goes out (rare but we have actually insisted he lose himself for an afternoon, he has no friends ofc) then we get busy. So it's about twice a week.