Here's the situation...

On Thurs, May 29, SO gets a call at work - BM crying asking if SO could take the kids for a few days. Why you ask? Because her grandmother is "dying" (the same grandmother who was dying 2 years ago when BM took all of her kids 1000 miles away to say goodbye instead of dealing with the eviction notice from her housing which caused her and the kids to live in a hotel upon their return). BM has five kids by four daddies; none of them thought enough of her to put a ring on it. Three - sometimes four - of the kids are living with her. Two are SO's.

SO told her he couldn't help her. (He sticks to the CO and doesn't negotiate with terrorists.) BM told him that she would call his mother and hung up.

Now, surely you're wondering why in the hell is MIL still talking to BM after all the things that BM has done to SO, MIL and me? Good question that SO and I tried to understand all last week.

BM called MIL and MIL told her that she couldn't help. Thank god. We see on FB that BM and her equally trifling mother went down to visit the "dying" grandmother. She even tells the world (public profile) who the kids are staying with...some babysitter.

Three days later MIL gets a call from BM saying that she needs to have the babysitter drop the kids off for "a few days" and this time, MIL says "Ok"... WTF? MIL calls and tells SO who is totally pissed about his mother doing this. He reminds her of BM's instability and that she just cursed MIL out through text last fall. He was on the phone with his mom twice begging her not to do this. Not only was MIL enabling BM, but she is effectively playing for the wrong team. SO is HURT by his mother's actions, yet of course, MIL "cares so much about her grandbabies" that she allows her loyalty to her own son to be trashed. He has his scheduled visitation (EOWe) this past Friday.

The kids end up being with MIL for 5 days until SO gets them for visitation! If MIL had not agreed to this favor, BM would have had to bring her sorry ass back home...I know, I know... spilled milk.

SO picks the kids up from MIL on Friday and they are happy to be here. We actually had a good weekend...the oldest admitted that her mother's actions were not fair and the youngest told us repeatedly how she didn't want to go home and she wants to live with us. We listened, we showed them love, and we acted like a real family this weekend.

Anyway, because during a drop off two years ago, BM hit SO with a car, he doesn't feel safe going to any drop-offs alone, so MIL goes with him. The routine is that he goes and picks up MIL and she rides to both pickup and drop off the kids. It's such a pain in the ass, but it's better than him doing it alone or with me (since she harassed me until I had to get the police involved MULTIPLE times).

Well today, SO is at MIL's house with all the kid's stuff, ready to drop them at BM's house (per the court order) and a phone call comes in to MIL's house...guess who it is? Yup. BM. Still out of town telling them that she NEEDS SO to keep the kids. Um, no MOTY. Some people work, and no one in this house is ever doing favors for your dumb ass. You fought SO for full custody and LIED to your kids about SO's relationship with me? ...then deal with your own babysitting issues. Your dying grandmother was recovering as early as last Tuesday according to FB.

BM's not going to be back for another few days and she has no one to pick up the kids, so guess where they are now? MIL's.

MIL is upset, but I can't be empathetic since she has to learn that if you throw these types of people a rope, they'll pull you down with them. Hopefully, next time she won't negotiate with someone who tried to kill her own kid and moved her precious grandkids away and then back within 8 months. SO and I are both angry at the fact that we were telling the kids that they were going home and now they are not. And of course, we're upset that the kids are going back with a diagnosed bi-polar with anxiety (that I suspect BPD, but definitely narcissistic) mother who claims that her kids are "her world" yet leaves them for 9 days! The oldest missed the last week of school over this crap. And get this...when the kids were told that they weren't going home, their response was, "Woohooooo." Ugh. This mother makes Mommie Dearest look like Mother Theresa.

Alright just had to fill you in on the details before I ask:

What is SO's next move? Filing a complaint? With whom? About what? Documenting it? How? Where?

BM basically abandoned her kids...she has full custody as SO and her weren't married and he filed for visitation as soon as she got back from her spiteful move. SO didn't ask for everything he wanted (custody) back then because he thought it would be too traumatic for the kids, then 7 and 4. And because it came as a shock that they actually moved back...we thought they were gone for good. The kids would clearly be better off with him, whether I'm in the picture or not. BUT...we don't want to be reactive here.

We were at a loss tonight after the drop off that didn't happen. I told SO that I'm coming on here to ask all you smart people, what should we do next?