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YOUR 2 CENTS FOR DR.PHIL

jstorie's picture

Okay,

sd14 is in a theraputic home. once again she is getting pushed through without completeing one damn thing. they say if she isnt doing anything there shes not going to do anything at home. So my DH and i have broke down. My five year old bio son raises his fist at me all the time throws himself down and yells i want to kill myself. We have just got him to stop these fits after 6 months still dealing with hitting me and raising fist.but to have her come home with the same additude? so dh contacted the dr.phil show. they want us to come on the show. I have a lot of reservations about going on the show. but my sd14 does not have another place to go. shes failing all her classes. her goal is to be a stay at home mother. shes been in 4 different mental hospitals now this. she has lived with us,grandparents and her aunt. all have ended really bad. do i just do it? get over myself. whats the different then venting on here versus getting help? is dr.phil really help or does he just want a good story? what do you guys think?

Comments

jstorie's picture

yeah we have been in therapy for 6 years. we have been unsuccessful at finding anyone to really help. we had one successful one a few years ago but she let us go because sd stopped making any progress. some of it is my fault i have no problem owning some of it.bioson hasn't started yet they wanted us to wait a year

DaizyDuke's picture

I don't know... like Dr. Phil or not, if you can handle being on the show and having your dirty laundry aired to millions of viewers, I think he does try to set people up with a plan for working through these types of situations.

He is always offering people counseling, therapy, diagnosticians, etc. Maybe he could be helpful?

jstorie's picture

When they talked to me last night they asked me what my biggest fear is. i said loosing my kids becuase of lies. The thing is this isn't the average stepmom case. i know this sounds silly but i am mom. i am stepmom too. mom went to prison when she was four and sd has talked to her 3x since and it was bad ...really bad she was an 8 year old told that her mom was going to kill me.Im the only one she has had. so i can't really just be taken out. however dh will have to step up.

jstorie's picture

Sd has been diagnosed bi-polar and adhd. but the current place she is in has mentioned borderline personality disorder. she has been suggested ODD. her Biomom has had problems like this she is bipolar and schizo.

kathc's picture

No, don't do it.

Going on tv just makes you a spectacle.

He'll blame you and make you look like an evil bitch no matter what you say/do. Something in the entertainment biz called editing...ever read about people that go on reality tv and then say later "I didn't hate that other girl! We even hang out now! I don't know why they made it look like I hate her!" RATINGS

BethAnne's picture

If there are aspects of your situation that put you at serious risk of having your son taken away from you then I think that needs to be adressed. Perhaps talking to a lawyer could help to clarify your rights and the likelyhood of it happening.

Apart from that I would suggest that you talk to your therapist about your desicion both on your own and with your husband. That way you two can air any feelings of blame or guilt on the other party in private before exposing yourselves on tv and after that you can decide if you want to participate.

My other concern for these types of shows is always the kids. Yes your SD is messed up right now, but if it is possible immagine a day when she is healthy and on the right path. Will having her personal trials as a teenager publically known hinder her future? If this truely is the last resort that you guys have for getting her help then it may be worth it but it is still worth considering when you make your desicions.

BethAnne's picture

I also wanted to add that your SD's therapists should also be consulted to see if they think it would be benificial or detrimental for her.

jstorie's picture

I agree with you a100%^^^^^ we do spank and we have recently broken him of the i wnt to kill myself issue. That was a learned behavior sd14 got away with so he tried it too. I'm on the fence about all of it I want whats best for my family and all I know is this isn't it.I do not think my 5 year old is mentally ill, I think he has learned behaviors that need to be broken before they get worse. Im afraid shes going to be comming hom soon and then we have to start over with him as well. Wish I would have listened when people told me step-parenting full time would not be easy. my fairy tail is a nightmare.