Need help Fast!!!!!
A friend of mine was just charged with vebal harrassment of his ex wife's new fiance'. My friend (and I will call him Joe) is a school teacher and was pulled out of school yesterday with the charge. He is now on suspension until this is cleared. I was present at the said harrassing and really didn't know what was going on.
Pre-details
Joe's ex wife up and left him a few years ago and the three kids. She met someone new and turned over custody of the three younger kids to him. She pays him child support and is able to live with new man. This summer EX decided she made a mistake (after joe got remarried) and took Joe back to court for custody of the kids...she lost and was real bitter.
Three weeks ago joe took his son to a wrestling tournament. I was there with my son. Ex and new finace walked in and went right over to Joe. Joe said some comments and told Finace something along the lines of "let's just take this to the mat and have it out." Ex and finace then sat two rows behind Joe and kids and new wife. Ex and fiance stayed at the tournament for about two hours, left, and then came back for the end of the tourn and sat still right behind Joe.
Supposively the harrassment comments were when Ex and fiance walked in. This was a gym with little kids everywhere and wrestling mats covering the floor. Joes three kids were around and his new wife. Fiance claims Joe threatened to kill him. Ex and fiance went in sat in the bleachers two rows behind. (They had and entire gym with bleachers on both sides to sit at but they chose to sit behind Joe) They left two hours later and filed the complaint with the police THEN came back and sat right behind Joe. Does any of this sound fishy to you??? Was Joe set up? Why did they stay if finance was harrassed so bad? Why did they sit two rows behind?? No one heard the comments but ex and finace so this is hearsay. What can Joe do and what do you see as potential pluses for Joe???
Were you a witness..
Directly. If so then go give your side of the story..
This mom sounds like a real winner.
it sounds like joe was the one harrassed....
just by them sitting behind him for 2 hours. if fiance truly felt threatened he would have left - when it goes before a judge, the judge will see that (hopefully)
Joe needs attorney
They have two things going against them... one, it took them two hours to report it and two, they chose to sit near him after the incident. One thing he has going for him is the location, because he can claim that he was using wrestling terminology because they were at a wrestling match. It was a figure of speech, not a threat. Also, as you pointed out, there was no third party witness to the exchange, so it becomes a matter of he said/they said. I doubt this would be taken seriously be a judge, if it even gets that far, and I doubt it would even be prosecuted. If they just made a report, then that's one thing. Joe needs to get a copy of that report and show it to his attorney. If the report does not result in a warrant for his arrest, which I seriously doubt it will, then his attorney needs to see what can be done about removing this from his record or possibly suing for defamation. It might be advantageous to Joe to pursue it himself in court, because as a teacher, something like this could hurt him career-wise. I think Joe's best advice is to not worry about being arrested and prosecuted, but to take it to an attorney to find out how to protect his career from any fallout.
~ Anne ~
Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: Pull down your pants and slide on the ice! -M*A*S*H (Sidney Freedman to the OR staff on dealing with stress)
By all means...
Do not just sit on it and 'wait and see' what happens, have Joe go to an attorney, because his job is on the line. If the job is suspending him now, he has to worry about his future... The job will not wait if they have reasonable suspicion to think something happened- especially since they suspended him.
I know this because a friend of mine, all because of his ex, made false allegations against him... and my DH had false allegations against him. Both cases, were awful. My friend lost his job, had to fight in court to prove he was innocent for a year, and when he was ordered to return, the officials at his job just harassed him, his image was tarnished and he did nothing wrong but had someone falsily accuse him. My DH was sitting on pins and needles for a full year, because here, the DA can bring it up to court and 'prosecute' him within a year. BM did this little stunk thinking that it he would get a little slap on the wrist, get more time and more money out of him, and ultimately get away scott-free... guess what. We had to hire a criminal attorney on top of a family attorney AND get an attorney for his Union. It was a HUGE and EXPENSIVE mess, all over a lie that we had full on blown witnesses saying it didn't happen... that didn't matter. The accusation was enough on it's own.
People just don't realize that when you make this type of false allegation, it affects EVERYONE- including THEMSELVES... it affects jobs, which will affect child support, which then affect the child, living arrangements, it can very quickly spiral out of control. I've seen it first hand. It's a very serious thing. Supposedly, we are innocent until proven guilty, but the factual matter is that companies and officials want to protect themselves, so ultimately, you are guilty until you prove your innocents. Please have Joe seek an attorney and counter act their claims.
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...
also, school or teachers union will pay...
for the attorney since it happened at a school function.
Police came to school and
Police came to school and took him to county jail in handcuffs....three weeks after it was filed
My finaces ex tried this one
My finaces ex tried this one once, said we had harassed her and then made her child sit outside alone until she got there which was like 5 hours. However, when she got there (and she just came cause she was mad at me) the child was sitting on my lap. She put a no contact order, but when it went in front of the judge they instantly dropped it, her story was different then what she originally wrote. He cant hen turn it against her or him for filing a false report. He needs to get on that
NO!!!! it was in the middle
NO!!!! it was in the middle of a wrestling mat in a high school gym with about a hundred little kids areound I read what the threat was that the finace claimed he used harrassment section whatever and said that Joe threatened to kill him verbally he used a form of verbal harrassment gave the date and the time as to when it happened I was no more than three feet away
prior to the arrest Joe had filed something to take Ex back to court for more child support Ex is pissed