Crap! I would call CPS and inquire what is acceptable. And as for your daughter sleeping with an unrelated family member, call your lawyer.

You should be concerned about your 3 y/o daughter sleeping with a boy that you have no idea what he has been subjected to or seen. This is not about your DH or about his new relationship but about the safety and security of your daughter.

I don't know that there are hard & fast laws in regards to boys & girls sharing rooms at what ages, but in court it can be presented as appropriate vs inappropriate & a judge can rule in regards to it & require changes to be made or they can modify the custody arrangement to have them sleeping in a home where the arrangements are more suitable.

Does your parenting agreement say anything about this? I know DH's has some sort of wording about each parent must provide private quarters for the children at their respective homes.

DH????? :? Don't you mean XH or STBXH? Don't honor him by calling him DH. He lost that honor when the marriage ended.

I understand your frustration with this. My SS used to have to sleep on the floor in the living room when he was on visitation with the SpermIdiot because the the children of SpermIdiots wombdonor of the month would get the beds and bed rooms.

When SS was ~5 the older half brother of SS's half sister pushed him out of a second story window. Fortunately there were bushes two stories down to break SSs fall but it took weeks for the scratches and bruises to heal and for us to get some of the thorns out his butt and back. The same evil womb spawn bit SS several times and he came home with bite shaped scabs on his back from a couple of visitations during the years that the SpermIdiot was spawning with the womb donor for SpermIdiot spawn #2.

We attempted to get CPS and the courts to intervene and rule that SS had to have his own room and bed when on visitation and that my SS's halfs sibs half sib by womb donor could not be in the home during my SS's visitation but the Judge told us we could not dictate where kid's slept in the SpermIdiots home and would not "remove another child from the home".

Grrrrr! I hate idiot judges almost as much as I do the SpermClan.

Legally there was nothing we could do. Privately .... my wife called her best friend from HS who's dad was a Police Officer in the town where they grew up and where SpermIdiot lives. He talked with his Officer and CPS friends. For the next few years the police force drove past SpermIdiots house several times a day during SS's visitaitons, took breaks outside of the SpermIdiots house and sevearl Officers would jog by his house when off duty. And CPS would drop buy for a “random” check when they were "in the neighborhood".

SpermIdiot finally figured out that he had to keep SS safe during visitations. Eventually he booted the wombdonor of SpermIdiot spawn #2 and her evil older child. SpermSpawn #2 ended up on SpermGrandMa's doors step as have SpermSpawn #3 and #4 due to the never ending string of womb donor's and the SpermIdiot's inability to support their children.

I can't stand SpermGrandMa but I will say this for her. She finally took the resident SpermSpawn away from her idiot son and is raising them in her home. They likely won't turn out any better than her idiot son did but at least they won't end up injured or otherwise neglected and abused by the SpermIdiots next GF or wombdonor.

It is unlikely that you will be able to have much influence in how your child is treated in XHs home and by his GF and her kids. But, letting XH know that you are watching, aware and will file complaints with the CPs if anything untoward is happening may keep his head out of his ass when your kids are in his house.

Good luck.