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I think I am setting myself up for disaster

daniball's picture

We are going to be moving into a new house in a couple months with an extra bedroom. My husband and I want to have more kids just not right now.

He got a call recently from BM about more CS and when he asked about SD she said that she is having trouble reading again. The girl is 9 and still can not read! My son is 5 and can. Don't get me wrong this girl is far from stupid she just doesn't have any help. It seems that every time he talks to BM there is another problem. SD is having heart problems, having breathing problems, school problems, ect... BM & her boyfriend both smoke, BM is a RN so she has odd hours and boyfriend has epilepsy so he gets violent when he comes out of a seizure.

Here is my issue... When he got this last call I suggested that she come live with us for a year. Doesn't sound like an issue right??? I am just scared that I am taking on more than I am going to be able to handle. I have two kids of my own, a SD who has a newborn that I take care of and love. I got laid off from my 50K job and just recently got a new one to start at half the pay now that I am drowning in debt. I have my psycho ex to deal with and not to add BM into it is rough. I don't have a problem with the BM other than she only wants the money and doesn't care about her daughter. My problem is that when she calls DH and tells him to jump he asks "how high?". He signs anything she asks even if it screws him. Every time he asks to see her BM conveniently has other plans. He hasn't been able to see her since last Christmas when we were allowed to take her to Chuck E Cheese for two hours. Ever since I came into the picture BM hasn't let SD come around because I think she is afraid of SD loving someone else. SD is a spoiled brat but I think that she at least deserves a chance to grow up in a normal house. I am just terrified that my marriage will suffer trying to make it through if she comes. Am I crazy???