DH expecting me to be the exact same as a bio mom to SD and basically expecting me to shoulder the burden exactly as if I was.

Also, I really cant stand SDs personality, so having to be around her.

If that's why you got divorced, then I'm screwed because you just described my life. Years of trying to communicate with my husband about my needs and concerns. Only to be told I was nagging. I don't know how I can possibly disengage more. I'm tackling with how to move forward with our marriage. 

OMG my DH says the same thing whenever I express my feelings that all I do is nag, nag, nag. It is utter BS!!

SD and BM continuously ruining our life. 

DH not sticking up for me and our child. 

Favoritism towards the brat he procreated with that nasty whore. 

His f*cked up priorities.

The fact that I resent SD and keep punishing her every time I see her. I'm really passive aggressive towards her. I can't even look at her in the face. DH made me hug her once and I wanted to throw up.

For me to leave DH, it would be giving money to BM to bail her out of her own mess. He has a big strike against him right now and almost lost me.

For him to leave me? My hypocrisy related to my family. I'd have a hard time not bailing them out even when I know it's a bad idea, and doing so without asking DH his thoughts first.

I've worked on this in myself a ton. DH had been working on his and gotten much better, but "fell off the wagon" around Christmas. I've been worse recently because of the pandemic and wanting to keep my family safe. We call each other on our sh*t, though, when it happens (or at least we try to).

-DH expecting me to be their "mom" or like their bio mom when they already have a mom. - First family expectations with a second family. -DH refusing to validate anything I was saying or feeling. -Invasive mother in law and ex who did not respect our marriage. - kids acting disrespectfully towards me and others repeatedly and it was rarely ever addressed - exhaustion due to working and having to come home to children who are entitled - DH not sticking up for me when it comes to his kids and family 

I can't believe the entitlement of these parents. If someone does not cater to their precious poopsies (kids) they have a real issue with that. I can understand wanting someone to be nice to your kids but for someone to allow their kids to control their life and marriage is ridiculous. They need a reality check that life does not revolve around your kids. Over half the time these kids are entitled brats who only think life revolves around them. The textbook product of a divorce. A one parent household and permissive parenting often has this result. 

I just went thru this situation with my girlfriend. (You can read the post i made 2 months ago to see how bad it was). Her 9yo son was the most rude selfish little shit i have EVER met. Would swear at me, never listen, mean to my daughters and his mom always took his side when it came to him vs me or him vs my daughters.

He would eat all the food i bought without hesitation. Even my kids school lunch food. If my gf brought home food for everyone he'd tell my kids they cant eat it because his mom bought it.. Would play with all their toys, and if my daughters even LOOKED at one of his peace of shit toys he'd run over and yell at them to not touch it. And would NEVER let my 4yo daughter be by his mom. He'd run iver and push her away and tell her she cant be by his mom.. All she would say is "he just doesnt like sharing me..."

I also spent more money on her kids than my own kids the year we were together. Her son didn't appreciate any of it. I took him to an indoor park once that he wanted to go to and spent $100 on his pass. When his mom told him to say thank you he refused to say thank you to me and would rather LEAVE than say thank you..

One night he yelled at the top of his lungs telling to to turn off a movie preview i was watching and his mom did nothing except say "eat your food sweetie.." I lost it and kicked them out. Haven't heard from her sense..

DH's inability to recongnize how toxic Killjoy is.  I have warned him that I will never allow her back into my life.  He hasn't really thought through the logistics of having a relationship with her outside our home.  He better never try to convince me she has changed.

As it is, I want to chew my foot off to get out of the trap of having Satan even tangentially associated with my life.  She is a psychopath and Killjoy is enmeshed with her.

If you are not prepared to remove your mother from your life, I do not believe reconciliation with your father will be possible for you. To ask him to resume even indirect contact with her through you would be to threaten him with continued abuse. 

https://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1081515/do-you-want-to-reunite-bec...

live in our marital home with my 2 kids then his shitty attitude and disrespectful shunning behaviour had to change immediately, him being a lazy piece of shit had to change immediately, him making home life so hostile and hubby enabling this behaviour to continue because he wanted no drama and was frustrated of the countless times he told ss off and ss claimed he suffered imaginary stress syndrome and did nothing wrong and hubby let that shit fly continually and expect me to tolerate this shitshow along with my 2 kids with hubby had to end or he could look for wife #3. 

Hubby said he didn’t want a divorce and i said this wasn’t a suggestion or option for him to say no because i was done and leaving this shitshow!! I told hubby he always claimed skids had a hard life like its an excuse and then never took our marriage vowd seriously because he should have stopped this nonsense 5.5 yrs ago but he didn’t so obviously he didn’t love or care for me and our kids together and he neither respected us because between shitty behaviour of skids and us wanting a peaceful harmonious life, hubby caved in to skid shitshow!!

when i told him he didn’t have a choice to say no to a divorce because it was bloody obvious he wasn’t interested in changing things for the better, the next time ss came home from uni hubby messaged me from work saying he’d be home a little late as he was picking up ss, hubby rained hell on ss that car ride home because within mins ss was vacuuming and scrubbing down his bedroom and bathroom courtesy of the cleaning basket i left in his room with bleach, sponges and scourer pads etc.... he was told by hubby that he could not lock his door as he lost the privilege to that privacy from his continual shitty behaviour and hubby checked into his room unannounced and told him he could not lock himself in his room all day and night, he had to play with his half siblings (his playing with my kids is to have my kids sit in a toy car ride on whilst ss operates the remote)

ss still is a recluse and with coronavirus lockdown and me being in a country overseas finishing my university studies hubby has called out ss on this shunning behaviour. It’s something hubby and his own family have had to tolerate since over a decade ago.

for me, they can choose to be arseholes but me and my kids don’t need to be a part of skid and biomum shitshow!!

Nothing.  There are things that could cause it but... those are far from likely.

As for a nagging wife..... fortunteatly I have learned that when my wife gives me her opinion it is a gem to be carefully considered and is far from nagging.  Apparently I am reasonably trainable and can stay just ahead of the nagging by doing what I should be doing anyway.  For the most part.

For me, the breaking point has been sheer exhaustion and the realisation that I have wasted years of my life being some other woman's personal slave and nanny so she could have a wonderful career while I was forced to put mine on hold. I'm done.

Though we aren't married, I'm formulating my exit plan as I write this.  Several things contributed but mainly it's my SO's complete inability to advocate for our relationship and her continued insistence that ex-husband around (he is here all the time, allowed to do laundry, BBQs, dinner, etc) and when I have pushed back, I get 'I'm not good with confrontation and he doesn't have anyone else...'.  So I've been basically a third wheel in my own life, watching the two of them 'tee hee' and remininsce about their past every time they are together, while I sit not knowing anything that they are talking about.  It's just too far gone for me.

Failure to launch by any of the skids and I will be packing my bags. 100 percent deal breaker hill to die on. I will NOT have adult kids living in my home....not ever. 

One thing - DH's family.