Hi all, it has been a while since I last posted as things have been going along ok. Little background, I am bio mom to 15 and 19 sons, and stepmom to 16 and 13 sd's. My dh and I have been together for 4 years and married for a little over 1.

My oldest sd has turned into a royal nightmare. She is staying out all night, taking off in the middle of the night when we are asleep, being completely disrespectful to her dad (and me but that is nothing new), basically doing whatever the hell she wants to when she wants to.

Well, I guess after the second time of her being grounded and having her car for use only to school and home, she decided to stay out til 3 am. After she had already received text from her dad to get her ass home at 9:00 pm, she decided to turn off her cell phone. Of course he is about to blow a gasket and I get to hear how disrepectful and how much trouble she will be in when she finally decides to come home. Well, I will give him credit, he took her car away completely and told her she is not responsible enough to have one. The car was never in her name, only his and he has begun using it as his primary mode of transportation. My problem is, he is still allowing her to go places with friends, allows her mother to pick her up and take her to friends houses, all while she is supposedly grounded. Her attitude completely sucks, she is always sulking or talking back when told to do something.

She actually came in our bedroom the night before last and informed us that she needed to go to the hospital because her friend had had a seizure. Keep in mind, this was at 1:00 am and I have to get up for work at 5:00 am. After her being told no repeatedly by her dad, he informs her that we have to get up early, she states in a very snooty voice, "I don't care, this is more important than your sleeping". I have totally disengaged with his two girls per our counselors advice unless it is something that affects my life. I came about as close as I have ever been to jumping out of the bed and knocking her block off. DO NOT stand in my bedroom and tell me that your friend, surrounded by her family at the hospital, whom you would not even be allowed to go in the room with because you are not related to her, is more important than the fact that I have to get up in 4 hours and face a VERY stressful job, is MORE important than me getting the rest I need.

After all of this, I tried to go back to sleep, to no avail. Once I am awake, I am awake. Of course her father falls back to sleep immediately. Keep in mind, he has told her "NO" probably 14 times. I hear the front door open and close and the car door to her aunts car open and close. She did not come back until almost 4 am. I called the hospital and the "friend" was released at 2 am and she did not get dropped off at the house by the same aunt who took her. When I relay this information to my husband while we are discussing the incident the next day (because he is under the misconception that she did as she was told, when in actuality, she did not), he gets angry at me for "tattling" on her.

I am at a weird place in my life right now and not sure which way I want to go. My oldest son (19) just moved into his first apartment two days ago. I keep thinking to myself how jealous I am of his freedom. Not freedom to do whatever he wants but just the freedom of not having to deal with all the drama at what once was a very peaceful home for both of my children. I used to think of my home as a haven and I couldn't wait to get there after a long day of work, and now I don't even want to go there. I walk in the door and his children are sprawled all over the couch watching tv in my living room, that I PAY for and I am forced to retreat to my bedroom because my DH will not tell them to get their lazy asses up and go to their rooms if they want to lay down. I am tired of feeling like a visitor in my home except for the fact that I am expected to spend my weekends off cleaning, cooking, and shopping only to go back to work on Mondays exhausted. My life feels like it has no direction right now other than a downhill spiral. I really don't know if I want to live this way for atleast 5 more years maybe longer until I feel like I am in charge of my life and home again. I know I would be much better off financially without the drain of him and his daughters. I love the man but not really sure if love is enough anymore.

Am I going through some sort of midlife crisis with my son moving out or are these my true feelings and it took this change to open my eyes. If anyone has ever had any reactions to their children moving out I would be very happy to hear about them. And any advice would be welcomed with open arms.