Im at a point where im feeling like such a mess and feel like ive let down myself and the people who love me because im constantly depressed and crying! My problem is not with BM. BM had had multiple affairs when SD5 was 2 and had drug issues and pretty much disappeared and had nothing to do with SD and DH again. DH has been looking after SD fulltime for almost 3 full yrs now. I myself have been in SD's life since 2 yrs ago. She calls me Mum and doesnt remember BM except for her name.