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Mrs Katch 22's Blog

Question for first time bio moms and existing stepmoms

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What feelings did you go through when you were pregnant? I've asked a few of my friends in this position, and there seemed to be a few things in common.

Ie. for a while, I was sad that this was my first time experiencing this and not my hubby's first time.

How I'd counteract this feeling: I'd think about how it's OUR first time experiencing it together..but part of me wanted for him to only experience it with me (yeah, maybe it's selfish, but whatever).

Explaining to your bio child why their half-sibling has a diff mom or dad

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Have you ever had to explain to your bio child why their half-sibling has a diff mom or dad? Normally I'd say when a couple is in love and really care for each other, they make a baby...which is not always the case, but I'd like to teach my/our child that. I feel strongly against children born out of wedlock...it's like, if you weren't ready to have a kid, why have one? I know a lot of people may not agree, but it's just my opinion.

SD at hospital during birth of bio child - UPDATE/OUTCOME!

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SD mentioned to her mom that she wanted to be at the hospital when our child was born. I have mixed feelings about this. In a way, I know it would be good if she can see the baby after the baby is born....but in another way, I want it to just be our time. BM didn't have to deal with any previous kids or anything when SD was born....what do you think?

UPDATE!!!!!!!!

BM probably going to have to do jail time

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BM just got charged GUILTY for an accessory after the fact (penal code 32 in California). Her sentencing is about a month. I have no idea of what kind of sentence she'll have, but I'm assuming maybe a year or more in state prison. Anyone know anyone that was convicted guilty of an accessory after the fact? It was a murder case and the guy who shot the gun was guilty with special circumstances. BM was the driver...she dropped him off at his house after the shooting.

Naming your child the name DH wanted to name his kid with BM

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I'm pregnant and we're thinking of baby names. DH had this deal with BM. If it was a girl, BM would pick the name. If it was a boy, DH would pick the name. It was a girl, so BM picked the name.

Now, I'm pregnant. DH wants to name our child's middle name the name he wanted to give his kid with BM.

Am I being petty, how would you feel about this? I kind of feel like "I don't want to use that name....after you tried naming your kid with BM that...." Would this bother you?

Would you be willing to pay more support to NOT have to deal with kid and BM?

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Maybe this should of been a poll, but I don't know how to create one.

Yes, I am bitter about the money, especially how BM fabricated her hand-written pay stubs...but sometimes, I'd be willing to pay MORE to just not have to deal with either of them at all.

Do you ever think of the circumstances as to how SK was conceived?

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Well, there's the universal way, but don't you ever think "WTF was he thinking?!?!?" If they weren't marrried...did she say she was on the pill, was it in the heat of the moment, was it a "I miss you f*ck," etc....

In my case, it was an "I miss you f*ck" that knocked BM up. What the hell was DH thinking back then..UGH! This could of all been prevented...then I go into "what-if" mode...if SD wasn't born, her and my now DH wouldn't of fought (he left because they argued too much), and maybe SD would of ended up being born anyways...digressing.

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