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back to work I go

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So my baby is almost 9 months old and I have to go back to work early due to the need for more money thanks to the custody change of ss. I live in Canada so my mat leave is for a year and is 55% of your normal income. I'm sad that I don't get those months back but I know that I'm lucky for having that long. The real problem is that I now work opposite shifts as Dh and I miss him. We both work the night shift so we only have one night where were actually sleep in the same bed at the same time.

wanting to make sure BS has enough

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So after bms lies the court awarded her custody (it was shared custody before) we are getting ss 4 days in a row every two weeks Sun-Wed. What is bothering me is that now we will have to start paying bm close to $700 in CS compared to the $200 we were paing her when we had shared custody. We have a 8 month old who has been sleeping in our bedroom because we only have a two bedroom house. He is still not sleeping through the night because he is a light sleeper and wakes when ever we so much as cough or sneeze.

chocolate covered cherries

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SS always ask if I love him the same as my BS. Our lawyer while in his office told me what he does when asked this. I thought it was really a great idea so here it is;
"I love you like i love chocolate and I love him like I love cherries. And my favourite candy is chocolate covered cherries "
I think SS7 will understand this so if the court thing ever gets settled I will have something to say to his question.

what I have learned

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Since being dragged through court here is what I have learned.
1. Bm's lie so record everything telephone calls, meetings, any words spoken between parents.
2. Save all text, emails, and have a backup of everything because computers break and cell phones delete things randomly because shit happens
3. Get receipts for everything. If you pay bm for anything that's in her name get her to write out a receipt. Only pay in cheques.

Never going to happen!!!

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So ss7 asked all weekend if our bs will be able to go to his moms house with him when he's older. Hahahaha Hell NO! Your mom won't ever spend any amount of time with my son, ever! She won't talk to him, touch him, I don't even like for her to see him. She bashes dh and I enough to her own son I can't imagine what she will say to mine. So just as ss is about to go to school and then his mom's for the week ss asks dh again, and in the midst of trying to make ss happy dh says sure in a few years.

so much drama

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So bm denied access to ss even though we have him 50% of the time and it has been that way ss entire life. So to the lawyers we go. We have done nothing wrong and I'm sure this has something to do with ss wanting to spend more time with us. I'm so tired of the constant drama. I will be glad when a court order gets into place so we don't have to live in fear of dh losing ss.

Stop using my baby as an excuse!

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If that stupid bitc* of a bm uses my 7 month old as an excuse for her sons awful behaviour I'm going to rip her a new one! The school asked if any changes have been made at home and she brings up my son but neglects to mention her moving out of her bf house, introducing a new man into his life, leaving said man, then getting back together with old bf, all while keeping her ex husband (not dh) in the picture. But no changes have been made at her house?????? Wtf! Meanwhile ss loves bs.

dont know what to do

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so dh is upset that my relationship with ss is not the same as it was before our baby came along. It's not like I dont play with him, or think of him while I'm shopping, or talk to him, or show him affection it just that I like the half of the week that he is not with us to just be about us and our son. I put in alot of work at what I feel is an ok relationship with ss. I find Im comparing how he treats the boys and it is putting a huge strain on our relationship. I also think thats why Im trying to make the part of the week when ss is not with us all about us and our new addition.

BM stop playing games

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So SS brings winter stuff back and forth between his moms and our place. We have him half the time and this is just the easiest thing to do. Well BM did not get her way about something and I guess in a power play packed up thin mittens for SS instead of his usual gloves. (Its cold his hand would have frozen wearing the mittens). When getting ready this morning for school DH notices the mittens and gets angry for the way BM was acting. He called expecting BM to meet them at the bus stop with the gloves. I FOUND ANOTHER PAIR OF WARMER GLOVES FOR HIM TO WEAR.

Wipe it yourself!!

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Your almost 7 years old you need to stop making DH do it for you! SS excuse "my mom does it for me at her house." BM your not doing your son any favors, he needs to be able to do it for him self. If you want your son to be able to function in the real world you have to let him grow up.

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