Update to SO Court Case
Update to previous blog about SO's CS case. Maybe 6 months ago, SO received notification that there was a CS review. From what the lawyers can tell, BM2 initiated it. Per the first review, SO was told that his CS would go up by about 50%, even though one of the SSs had aged out and the other one is 50/50, except that SS13 is at SO's house *every* afternoon and evening after school, even on BM2's week.
SO fought the increase and his lawyer filed a motion to have BM2 provide her financial information for all sources of income. BM2 is very shady and supposedly does eyelashes here and there but doesn't have a job with a schedule. She claims minimum wage.
So, court is tomorrow and BM hasn't provided any financial info. SO's lawyer sent her lawyer a letter stating he still hadn't received it and proposing 0 child support, just 50/50 no CS with expenses split. BM's lawyer replied yesterday stating that BM will settle for $400 per month and half of expenses. The court was originally going to give her almost $1000 per month based on her stated income.
SO meets with the lawyer today. He will decide whether to take the deal and be done with it or continue the case and require BM to provide financial info. So far, SO's lawyer has dug up info on two rental properties in BM's name amd a recent DUI. BM has been known to use various names, various DOBs, and when she and SO first divorced, SO's other lawyer found a bank account with $90,000 in it, though at the time Bm had no job. She "helps" her mom and uncle's businesses by travelling out of state to "pick things up." No telling what they are into.
I told SO that either course of action would be reasonable. I understand just paying her for the next 5 years and being done with it. I also REALLY want to know what BM is so afraid of the court seeing, though, as far as financials.
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Yes! Have DH throw his
Yes! Have DH throw his knowledge of her facts on the table and make it a final situation, no recalculations going forward. Even if she denies it, she will know he knows and might not want to risk it. Time to play the hand he was dealt.
I want to know what she's
I want to know what she's hiding too. If the court awarded her 1000 and she immediately dropped to 400 it's got to be good. Wouldn't it be something if she owes DH money?
I know, how bad must it be?
I know, how bad must it be? He is meeting with the lawyer in about an hour, so i'll update. I do understand just wanting peace and to be done with it. Pay her just to keep things nice. I'm not egging him on to fight, since i know i just want to see her get what's coming to her and it's coming from a place of anger on my part. She is close with his family and has used that to pressure him into catering to her in the past. He was paying her full CS, he had both SSs 100% for years with her just coming in and out to "hang out as a family" or pick them up for however long, whenever she felt like it with no responsibility, and his family kept telling him how great of a guy he was to be so close with his BM and help her out so much. When he set minimal boundaries she slapped him with an ex-parte full of false accusations. Not gonna lie, i want to see her exposed for the bottom-feeder she is. But i just keep saying "do whatever you and your lawyer think is best."
Nope. No "I just keep saying". Words are useless without action
"do whatever you and your lawyer think is best."
Start telling SO what he will do and also lay out what the consequences are if he fails to execute to your expectations or otherwise effectively address the problem.... to your satisfaction.
I never had to do this though there were a few times over the CO years where I played the "enough is enough" card. DW is generally a very empathetic and forgiving person. I am... Though only if it is earned. The SpermClan has never earned it so my perspective with them is scorched Earth.
DW has always been one to assess and adapt very effectively when her compassion leaves an opening for the SpermClan to engage in their toxicity. Sometimes at my insistence.
If issues are not effectively dealt with, I have been known to grow more insistent. Fortunately, it has not resulted in crucial disagreements for us.
So far at least.
All IMHO.
I would tell her lawyer that
I would tell her lawyer that you have proof of her multiple identities sources of revenue and that if she doesn't back off completely, you will be giving your information to the IRS... After that,do what you want.
Update: SO settled. He will
Update: SO settled. He will pay $400 per month CS, continue to pay SS's phone and health insurance, and he will continue to keep SS after school on BM's days. He will pay half of any copays or extracurriculars BM pays for (which is zero so doesn't matter.) BM does not have to provide any financial documents.
Meh. At least he gets a reduction from what he was paying before for both kids. I get just wanting the fight to be over. I don't think she can go after more CS for at least a few years.
Once the Judge signs off on it...... report her to the IRS!
No need to let her keep smirking over getting away with anything.
My thoughts precisely. Why
My thoughts precisely. Why let all your hard work gathering all that data go to waste?
SO did make the IRS report!
SO did make the IRS report!
Yay!
Yay!
Too many systems
Profit off of the BM cashing in
That's true. I found out that
That's true. I found out that DCFS gets a percentage of all wages garnished. It really does add up when you think about the percentage of kids whose parents are not together. For my state it's over 60% from what i've read. That's a lot of percentages of child support for the state to skim off, even if not all go through CPS for garnishment.
While the poor choice in breeding partner extortion industry
pisses me off to no end.....
As the SP married to the CP in our blended family journey, when a toxic NCP bares their own ass, direct payroll withholding is a God send.
In our case, the Spermidiot never paid his own CS obligation. SpermGrandHag paid it. Payments were made directly to the CSE office, in patches of coins, small partial cheques, etc.... DW would bet multiple partial random sized payments each month.
After 9yrs of this game playing over CS of a whopping $133/mo, I was finally able to get DW to file for a CS modification after I was RIFd in the semiconducor industry implosion in the early 00s. My logic was that if I was not working, I had no income to be considered for use
The Spermidiot refused summons to the hearing repeatedly ignoring service by mail from the DA's office, then refused to pick up signature required service at the USPO, and finally physically ran from a Constable who was attempting to serve him in person.
The DA invoked the 600% increase after asking DW to provide as much information on the Spermidiot's income an demployement as she could. She went CPA on his idiot ass. She and I did about a week's worth of research, gave his empoyment information to the DA's office, provided his plumber's license number, the county wage distribution study information including the information on Plumber's hourly rates. The DA also invoked direct payroll withholding. The first $0.00 pay weekly paycheck he received the Spermidiot called his mommy and they came screaming to get a CS review hearing scheduled. We attempted to get it waived since no one can request a CS review for 2yrs after a review without significant change in circumstance. The SpermClan lost their minds over that. Though our motion to hold to the 2yr schedule due to no major change in circumstance in the two weeks since the new CS order was invoked was declined.
We went loaded for bear, they came with two most recent pay stubs. Long story short, the 600% increase in CS was upheld for a period of a year because of the Spermidiot's running from the Constable and otherwise refusing summons to the CS review hearing. Once the arrears were recovered back to the first filing date, CS dropped from the 600% level to %300% where it remained for the final 6 years the CO was in force. After two years the portion of CS requiring SpermClan to pay for 50% of SS's after school care could be stopped at the request of either party. We of course did not make that request. Because the SpermMorons never even read the new CS order, neither did they.
Direct payroll withholding was the best thing we ever invoked against them. Actually, the DA invoked it, but it was the best thing to ever happen. No more pennies at a time incremental CS payments, it all came at once. The Karma part.... SpermGrandPa climbed SpermGrandHag's ass for reimbursing
the Spermidiot for the CS taken out of his paycheck. She used to directly pay his CS to the CSE office. After the CS review order, Spermidiot whine and cried for the Hag to pay him. SpermGrandPa, was not on board so the internal SpermClan drama was jacked way up after payroll withholding.
I think direct witholding is
I think direct witholding is easiest for all. SO isn't the NCP but based on our laws he still has to pay based on BM's apparent lack of income. They have 50/50 overnights but SO also has all afternoons and evenings on school days, even BM's days. It's fk'd up here in my state, and the lowest earner is rewarded with money no matter who has the kids most. They use a formula of time with each parent and relative income. But, if CS was paid directly between parents, it would open the door for the money-getter to have more opportunities to ask for extras. It does, however, incentivize the state to squeeze the higher earning parents.
Sounds like your state uses a version of the Percentage Income
Model. Though it could also be a variant of the Income Shares Model.
In the Percentage Income Model, CS is set only from the NCP's income. The CP's income is generally not considered. Since it is 50/50 stipulated custody, the higher earner is likely on the hook to normalize resources available for the SKid while in the lower earners home. Which may be the case for your DH's CS obligation.
We were fortunate that SpermLand uses a modified version of the Income Shares Model. They not only consider both parents income, they divide % of responsibility based on parenting time. DW had full physical and legal from birth of SS. As her income went up, the Spermidiot's CS obligation went up. DW completed a dual major undergraduate degree, a graduate degree, and a professional certification with a successful increasingly high income career. The Spermidiot purposely pursued under employment to minimize his income in the mistaken perspective that it would minimize his CS. Some of my fondest SParenting events were when his CS would go up as DW's income went up and his remained flat. The Income Shares model can increase CS owed by the NCP even when the CP has overwhelmingly more parenting time and an overwhelmingly higher income than the NCP. Which is the impact that was invoked against the SpermClan as DW's income and career advanced.
The Percentage Income model does not always preserve a self support % of income for the NCP and CS is set only by the NCP's incomet unless the specific state has a self support budget that can be allocated out of the NCP's income. Even when the CP is the higher earner.
The third CS model is the Melson Formula which is a variant of the Income Shares model.
Also, i really wanted to see
Also, i really wanted to see BM's financial info. I wanted her shady illegal crap to be exposed. Honestly, i don't think SO and i will cohabitate or marry until his legal ties to this criminal parasite are finally severed.