I've started spying on my husbands iMessages because at times it is the only way to find out what is going on in my own home. I know it is not really ok but the relationship is pretty much over, I'm just protecting myself at this point. I stopped him from signing $100,000+ in loans for his daughter who will soon drop out of school, even BM says she won't finish and DH agreed but had I not initiated this he just would have gone along with it and signed the loans for tuition, books and a luxury apartment, hell NO. My kids lived in squaller in college and loved it!!

Now that I read his texts, I see there is something wrong with him. He uses his kids to fill his emotional needs and I always somewhat knew that and that is why he can't parent them, he looks to them for constant attention and approval and adoration. If he parented them they wouldn't fulfill that need that he has. It is sooooooo much worse than I thought.

On to the emotional incest. I always thought the constant texts were annoying maybe weird...i'm leaving love you, ok love you, i'm here love you, ok love you, i farted love you, ok love you, im on lunch break love you, im going to walgreens love you, i'm going to starbucks love you, ok love you ok love you. This is what DHs conversations with the girls 18 and 21 look like. I thought it was annoying, weird whatever. Always say good night and good morning by text even when they are in the next room. Now that SD21 lives away from home, he still makes her, yes makes her, tell him everywhere she goes and everything she does. He bitched at her because she went to his sister's, Auntie T's house on a Friday to do her laundry and she didn't tell him. He found out because he looks at her location on Iphone...several times a day for both girls. SD18 didn't tell him she was getting her eyelashes done before work and he texted her immediately, where are you, why are you at a house??  WTF, she is 18. Back to SD21, she has been gone 3 weeks, We saw her once at Nana's birthday party but she hasn't been home to visit. He harasses her by text asking when she is coming to visit and spend the night. She's only been gone 3 weeks and she goes to Aunt T's every weekend and he makes her feel guilty for going. He bitched that she didn't tell him she was going and then he says "that's ok, I get that you like them better and you'd rather spend time with them."

He occasionally sends me cute or funny selfies from work and now I realize he sends the same selfies to the girls. That was so gross to me. Especially when he is trying to be cute or sexy and makes silly kissy faces. There is something wrong with him. I feel cheated on at times when he does things like that. He has ruined the girls.  SD18s realtionship is very f'd up where she needs constant attention and this guy is going to leave her because there is no pleasing her. She starts fights with him for conastant attention and if he doesn't message her IMMEDIATELY he hears about it. She thinks he is talking to another girl.

He also will send them the same texts as me at times and I think something that was meant for me was not and my response to something is not good enough. What prompted me to write this is I saw a message from SD18 that she sent to her boyfriend, her messages are on the ipod too but I don't read them unless they pertain to me but because this was the last text she sent to boyfriend it was visible and then she copy and pasted the message(or retyped the EXACT message) to her dad. It's like daddy/daughter dating almost. I wonder if he thinks about his kids whle we are having sex. This is how I now feel about my husband. WTF. And DH is pissy that I want to change my name back to my maiden name, I don't want to be one of these people. I also don't want to be googled and have their name pop up as related to mine. Between the bad credit and who knows what else, i'd rather have my own name.