That's why their past relationships failed.

It is true that everyone has failed relationships however having a failed relationship with someone whom you chose to have multiple children with is slighty more concerning. Especially if there is a pattern of behavior where the person is a financial user and never admits to any responsibility as to why the relationship failed and the ex is always the problem, never them of course coincidentally. I agree that in these situations there is usually at least one narcissist, either them, their ex or one of their children. Maybe even a combo.

My ex definitely had narcissistic tendencies (financial using, self centered, cold, manipulative, smear campaigning). I do believe he was well on his way to becoming a full blown narcissist if he isn't one already. Looking back I do not believe his ex was the problem like he so often proclaimed. I believe the problem was himself and his mother. One of his kids also has a lot of narcissistic tendencies (lazy, self centered, expects to be catered too, manipulative) which were learned behaviors from his parents and grandmother.

My exh was a true narcissist.  EVERY trait.  He was also very abusive, verbal, emotional, physical, you name it. He had several undiagonesed mental health/personality disorders as well.   He had some relationships after we divorced but never remarried- I honestly know it's because nobody is 'good enough' for him (he's an extreme misogynist also-so underlying hates all women)- truth is most women his age are way smarter then my young teenage as was and I was easy to manipulate.  I think no woman is dumb enough to stay with him once they see his true colors (he's actually quite quick to show them).  

BM was narcissistic, also abusive and also diagnosed bi-polar and a former meth addict.  Her fights with SD were epic (and every partner she had, both male/female, dozens of police reports, arrests, domestic disturbances, etc).  They were the same when her and DH were married-she remained combative and horrible to us when we got together.  

SD was showing traits when younger, now it's more like typical selfish young adult of this generation, but I've seen her be very giving and hard-working and helpful to my MIL, her fiance, her friends, etc....so though it seemed she was going in that direction, she has turned things around.  

A lot of people throw narcissist around when a lot of it is other issues or typical young kid/teen behavior.  Some outgrow it, some dont'-that's why Dr's don't really diagnose narcissism until later in life- most kids display these traits, doesn't make them a narcissist, kwim?

I have never heard of people who are narcissistic choosing to date people with kids. Why would a narcissist want to date a single parent who can't devote 100% of their attention to them? Seems counterintuitive to a narcissist! 

I think my DH and BM both have narcissistic tendencies though they are not full-blown narcissists. BM is spoiled and thinks that she's better than everybody. My DH is very charismatic and can be prone to being self-absorbed. 

It's interesting to see what these narcissists do to their kids...in our case, 2 of the 3 adults kids have diagnosed psychiatric disorders.  SD30 has been diagnosed with bipolar and SS28 is borderline.  We are waiting to see what SD26 comes up,with.  All this means is that they will all be dependent on narc BM for a very long time.  It also means that none of them have successful relationships with anyone but BM.  This is success to a narcissist.  Sad.