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It's been a week

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Sat, 08/10/2013 - 4:13pm

It's been a week since BF and his kids came back from their vacation. I know everyone of you told me I should leave him and my head agreed with everyone of you, however my heart was not ready. After knowing I would have a place to go, I believed he had a change of heart too. Typical, I know, all that "I don't want you to go" stuff, blah...blah...blah, I know. But I didn't agree to try again because of his "talk", I want to give it one last try because my heart was not ready to walk away yet, no matter how strong my head's opinion was.

The third day

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Mon, 07/29/2013 - 3:19pm

The third day I am here all by myself living a house decorated sort of the way I like it. Oh how I miss being drama free! We have been keeping in touch on and off through text. The plan of moving is still on the agenda though the date hasn't been picked yet. Been having mixed feelings since the moment I woke up! Sad

Nice and quiet

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Fri, 07/26/2013 - 7:33pm

BF(soon to be ex?) and his kids just left for their yearly vacation up north. The house is all mine for one whole week. I have not felt so relax in a long time. Before he left, he said "this is your house for the week". Guess what? I did just that, I made it my house for the week. I took down all the pictures of his kids including those on the refrigerator. No more stinky faces staring at me anymore, I found myself actually smiling when I walked into the kitchen. What a wonderful feeling!!!

Now I can stay and take my time to think?

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Thu, 07/25/2013 - 12:54pm

Yesterday I told (soon to be ex)BF I was moving to this other town with the help of this new acquaintance I met. He interpreted it as I met another man and moving in with him, so I let him believe that. Then his attitude changed, no more telling me how much "sacrifice" he made for me concerning his kids; no more talking about spending unnecessary money on his kids was the right thing to do; no more telling me to move out before he comes back from the vacation with his kids.

I hate to feel this way!

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Wed, 07/24/2013 - 12:02am

I think finally I have a place to go. If everything goes as plans, I am moving to a small town 3 hours away with the help of a new acquaintance. I should be excited to have a chance to start a new life, however, I am not. My heart is breaking, I am so angry with him right now but on the other hand I already started to miss him before stepping out. I wish I could hate him more, I wish I could hate him to pieces. All the dreams and plans we made are all gone like dandelion dusts.

He wanted revenge, he got it!

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Mon, 07/22/2013 - 2:15am

It would be much easier if I had family, but no, I am all alone, no support network. This morning I was sorting things see if I could pack some and throw away more, and all of a sudden, BM's car pull up and his kids ran into the house. I was surprised because it's not his weekend. I asked him about it, he said he wanted them to come over to swim and they stayed all day until after 10 pm. He knew when they were here, I wouldn't be able to concentrate on packing and sorting, so I ended up doing nothing other than locking myself in his bedroom.

He's been spiteful

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Sun, 07/21/2013 - 9:16pm

Thank you for all of you who posted your concern for me. Actually he can kick me out, he has the right because we are not married, I was just the girlfriend. This is his house, not mine, not ours. He has been spiteful, everything that I put on the counter, end table, coffee table, hung on the wall were removed and replaced with his kids' pictures. He's making a statement that I don't belong here. I still don't know what to do. A moving truck costs over $1800 (not including gas) if I want to move back to the west, plus I have no one to drive the truck for me.

It's official

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Sat, 07/20/2013 - 7:12pm

It's over. Yesterday we had a fight with him telling me he didn't have money to get a some cheap parts (about $38) to fix the ice dispenser in the fridge a couple day ago but turned around to spend $30 on some swimming goggles for his kids. So he went off to his friend's house until 10 o'clock when I called him to pick me up at Walmart because I was too tired to walk home. He flat out refused so I walked 30 minutes to get home when it was pitch dark out with rain pouring on my face, it was a stormy night with lightning and thunder. I came home soaked from head to toe.

How do I change my mindset?

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 12:35am

I guess now it all depends on if I can tolerate and being in the same room as BF's kids without feeling totally uncomfortable and awkward. Everyone here is telling me to leave him and yes, yes, many times I thought of leaving, but the idea of really walk out of the door is a bit overwhelming, it's not that easy to just walk. BF asked me not to hate him but I am not sure when it comes to the day I really walk out, will I be able not to hate him or blame him because he laid it all on me to determine the outcome? How do you all do it?

On the fence

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Submitted by Clovergirl on Mon, 07/15/2013 - 2:11pm

What all of you said about my last post were, unfortunately, so right on. Onefootout, I agree he's doing exactly what you pointed out - preemptive strike. He wanted to manipulate me into caving in to play house with him, replace me with their psycho BM and become one loving family again. The problem is I did not make those kids with him, they are not the products of our love.

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