Frustr8d1's Blog
RE: What's with Women and Step Children?
Does anyone ever wonder why there are no websites (that I know of anyway!) for moms to vent about their own children? See, when it's your biokids, no one raises an eyebrow when you correct their behavior, tell them no, or even complain about them. In fact, most parents find it quite normal to get irritated with your kids' behavior and to want your own adult time. With biokids, there are plenty of things you can say or do to shape your kids. Bioparents are even allowed to joke about wanting to send their kids to mars.
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Time to Throw in the Towel?
It's one thing when SD9 has one mental issue after another and lies compulsively. But, to have DH believing it...makes me want to run so fast and so far that no one will ever find me.
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Forgotten SMs
Amazing...right after I posted how much I'm used and forgotten by the person who I do everything for every day...Lo and behold, SD walks in and drops a load of school paperwork on me. Sign here, correct this, sign there... Plus, she wants me to send money for the school to send her a Halloween card/treat to her classroom.
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At the End of the Day, I'm Nothing More than an Object to SD
Quick recap:
- 4 yrs ago, married DH who had a 4 yr old.
- Discovered brain tumor. Emergency craniotomy.
- My "gift" coming out of ICU was fullfuckingtime custody of SD5.
- BM walks away, never to look back.
- 3 yrs later BM decides to visit from 2,000 miles away for one weekend. Visit was uneventful.
- During first 3 yrs with full custody, SD tells me she wants to call me mom since I'm "the one who takes care of her."
- BM convicted of 3 felony frauds.
- 3 yrs of normal SD type issues.
Is there a balance with disengagement?
I've recently sought ideas here about finding the right balance between disengaging and being involved with SD9. A few weeks ago, I overheard SD talking to DH about school work when DH suddenly yelled out, "Too bad...if you are lying about your schoolwork, then it's your fault when your teacher punishes you." I have no idea what that was all about...and I took the advice from many on here and didn't even ask DH what happened. Like many other things lately, I'm just letting it go.
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Confusing Roles for Fulltime SMs
Earlier, someone posted, "You CANNOT be your kids friend, you are their PARENT. Period. Parents should never try to be their kids friend. And she CAN be their friend because she's NOT their parent."
I couldn't agree more! With my own bios, I always believed I cannot be my kids' friend. They need a parent, not a friend. They need guidance.
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Happy Friday....Not
Does anyone else remember a time when you actually looked forward to weekends and you were so happy it was Friday?! What happened to those positive feelings of looking forward to the weekend? Now it's just dread of how to tolerate and entertain SD. How to avoid feeling guilty all weekend. How to answer questions I really don't want to answer. How to tolerate the stares, the rudeness, the inappropriate behavior.
These days, I dread Fridays and love Mondays...wtf happened here?!
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Not My Kid, Not My Problem...But is It??
For all you seasoned SM veterans out there, I have a truly genuine question. How far should us SMs take the idea of "not my kid, not my problem?" I have SD9 full time. BM has contacted SD 3 times in 3 years and only seen her twice. So, skid IS my problem and I'm the only mom she really knows.
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Did the School Bell Ring Already?
That time of day when my blood pressure rises, I get "hot flashes" even though I don't think I've hit menopause yet, I can't sit still, I want to go hide while at the same time I want to face it, I'm frantically thinking of what to do, what to say, how to act, how to supress my feelings...
You would think I'm waiting for my first Prom date....but alas, I'm awaiting the daily arrival of the lying, manipulating, ever-creative sociopath, SD.
As Dr Phil entitled his recent show, WHAT were you thinking??
Sigh.
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SD9 Cannot Control her Lying
I am convinced that SD9 is a Master Manipulator and a Professional Liar. What can I say...even DH is in awe of the DAILY lies, even when SD is caught red-handed. So, I have to wonder how DH can expect me to just continue with the pretend family when I know this is not normal.
I'm SO beyond even caring anymore that I don't even care to go into detail. That's how bad it is.
Fk this.
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