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Ah Ha Moment with not listening to me and never making SD9 accountable..ha ha ha and bla

halfstepmom2skids's picture

SD9 has been running around my house for 6 years cutting curtains, gouging a pen a million times into my new wood dinning room chair, stealing my shit, paint on carpet, marker on carpet and dumb dumb dumb H NEVER making her accountable one time for it. I don't know why the hell i am still with him, pretty dumb myself for now. (3 1/2 years when my DS is gone and im out if it still happens)

Anyway, got a knock at the door saying SD9 is hanging around kids that have damaged a car and never has any parental guidance with bad kids. THe funny, H stood up for her 2 weekends ago when i asked him what the hell was wrong with him letting her ride her bike at 9:00 at night with these kids. I had MATERNAL instincts and new they were bad scum. Tried to tell him but he got attitude with me and said he would raise her. Ok mother effer, got yours tonight. But guess what, no consequences and no accountability. Ohhhh he is creating a freaking monster. I told him this on our walk and if he don't get it for whatever reason, i cant freakin wait to say told ya so again, cuz guess what baby aint no kid in this world turned out good without accountability. HA Told YA So Sucka

Comments

zenjetset's picture

WOW!!! Sounds like he is trying to be her friend or something like a guilty daddy or I don't know...destruction of property - your home and the things in it - NOT COOL!!! Stealing your personal things - NOT COOL! I deal with that one all the time. Everything else, NOT COOL. He needs to grow some balls and start being a parent to this child. IF I were you, I would basically tell him you are not invest in the relationship with his child UNTIL HE DOES. WTH?!

halfstepmom2skids's picture

So many people have said he is guilty daddy and trying to be her friend on this site. He definately is and is practicing neglectful and non-parenting on this child and I have accepted that I have no control over it to help her. I do to live someone like a prisoner in guarding my stuff now and carrying my conditioners and stuff in and out of my room. Like i said i accept it and don't want pitty for what i expose myself too, but i also have a time line of how long i will tolerate it.

zenjetset's picture

Welcome to most of the step moms world on StepTalk. Most if not all carry our expensive make-up, conditioner, shampoo, hair brush, cremes, etc. in and out of the bathroom. Because once something is stolen, missing, miss placed, broken, thrown away, etc. You realize you will never allow yourself to be voliated again.

I got a pretty basket, like a spa like basket, placed all my items in there and use it everyday, whether or not the kids are here. I am reminded everyday that I shall never let my guard down with these kids.

I feel for you...you need a partner that will listen and really hear you. If not you are stuck in a very bad situation for YOU.

My dh, cares and loves me. He may not do everything right, but he makes modifications as needed.

YOU NEED THAT, because if not you are doomed, but communication is key. That comes with understanding each others position with the skids and the stress it adds to the relationship.

Good Luck! I know it's hard. Realize you have people who care here on ST