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Guilty Dad Syndrome

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I've posted here several times about how my SSs have a tendency to not do homework. Last year, we went to the mid-year conference and found out that neither child handed in much homework. Before that point, DH had not seen any report cards (they had the correct mailing address for him on file in the office and kept telling them we mailed them, but we never received any, even after going to parent conferences). He decided that he was going to call both boys daily to check in on homework and work with them on it, via phone.

Skiing lessons vs basketball...continued

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Yesterday, BM sends DH an email informing him that both kids are playing basketball and giving him the dates of the games. She is sure to say "you got emails from the school about this, so you should have known about it." Um, the emails DH got were "youth basketball registration is open". Neither kid has mentioned basketball and BM did not say "hey, the kids want to play basketball, so I'm going to register them. Many of the games are on your weekends, is that ok?" BM also includes the receipt and tells DH how much she paid for basketball.

I actually had a good visitation weekend!

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Just wrapped up our visitation weekend and it actually went really well.

DH had a leadership conference to go to on Friday evening and Saturday for most of the day. He tried to pick the kids up early on Friday evening, but BM refused (just to be petty, it's not as if she and the kids spend quality time together, she's usually not even home when he picks them up on Fridays).

Contact lenses and skiing lessons

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It's been almost a month since he got them and SS still cannot put his contact lenses in on his own. Also, he seems to have lost his cleaning solution and rewetting drops...or couldn't be bothered to bring them with him to our house. Thanks, BM, for not being a parent and allowing your kid to get something he was totally unprepared for. The only good thing was that she sent DH an angry email about some other expense and he told her "contact lenses were your choice. I paid for glasses. I will not be paying for contacts."

Dysfunctional Families

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After DH's divorce, he moved in with MIL because he didn't have enough money to afford a place big enough for his kids to stay EOWE. When he and I became engaged, he moved in to my apartment (which was also not big enough for his kids to stay) and then stayed at his mother's house on his visitation weekends. MIL travels somewhere between 3 and 6 months of the year, so she was around a little more than half the time he was staying there. When she was there, however, she took on a large parenting role with my SSs, which DH allowed her to do.

Money and Immature Behavior

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Ugh, the BM in my life is an adolescent when it comes to dealing with DH. She loves to try to turn things around on him in that "I'm not doing that, you're doing that" way that teenagers do.

As expected, after buying contacts for SS11 without consulting DH, she sent an email to complain how much extra money she was paying and how he never contributed any extras. In that email, she also said she was going to get braces for SS11 and she was "putting her foot down" over DH not contributing.

Phantom Concussions

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This afternoon, DH comes up to me to ask if we have any chargers that work with SSs phones, because despite the fact that he texted them on his way over to pick them up and said "bring your chargers and phones" neither one brought a charger. I said, "why do you need a charger?" DH says, "SS11 misses his mom and wants to call her." I replied, "he's going to see her in less than three hours."

Surprise contact lenses

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THIRD UPDATE: BM sent DH an email today talking about all the expensive medical services she has paid for on her own and demanding he contribute money for the contact lenses and braces she plans to get for SS.

SECOND UPDATE: I'm taking an afternoon nap on Sunday and get woken up by DH "can you help SS put in his contacts?" I can hear SS crying in the background. I simply reply "no, if he wants to wear contacts he needs to be able to put them in himself."

Ex In-Laws

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BM's father loves loves loves DH. About nine months after DH and I started dating, I went to one of SS's flag football games. As DH and I arrive in the parking lot there is an older man waving wildly from his truck and yelling DH's name. I was like "who is that?!" and DH replied "oh, that's BM's father." Since that time, BM's father has invited DH out to lunch, has asked him if he wants to go fishing, etc. DH always politely declines, because he really doesn't want to be socializing with BM's family.

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